Country Wax

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 13, 2008 07:58:58 November 13, 2008 07:58:58

Carrie Underwood won big last night at the CMAs. She also changed, like, 45 times. And each time she came out, she still looked like her wax figure so in the style department, she’s not exactly kicking Porny Simpson’s ass… As for that mall hair I mentioned in reference to Taylor Swift – straight on top, curly on bottom – perfect example right here on Country’s biggest bitch whose ego, if you can believe it, is actually heavier and more volatile, than her hair. Full Story

Lifetime Achievement Award

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 13, 2008 07:26:00 November 13, 2008 07:26:00

Is that the old lady recipient of the Lifetime Achievement Award at the CMAs this year? No. That is Granny Freeze Nicole Kidman looking elderly on the red carpet. And, once again, drawing attention to her belly. Like there might be something in there. Or reminding us that there was something in there. Full Story

Red Belle Lips

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 13, 2008 07:16:30 November 13, 2008 07:16:30

Reese Witherspoon presented last night at the CMAs looking so happy and so healthy, in red lips and black lace and big hair and embracing the country spirit. Reese is just kicking off promotion now for Four Christmases with Vince Vaughn. Movie poster is attached. She really is that short. He really is that tall. Full Story

Teen Triangle!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 13, 2008 07:06:00 November 13, 2008 07:06:00

F-ck the Brange and Aniston. Teen cheating is what it’s all about. So Taylor Swift was dating one of the Jonas Brothers. Joe, I think? Whatever. They broke up, she decided not to take the discreet route, told everybody he did it over the phone, in like, 27 seconds, all conveniently while she’s promoting her new record. Full Story

Backpedalling with the Mighty Opes

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 13, 2008 06:42:59 November 13, 2008 06:42:59

I might actually PVR this sh-t. If only to see how far Oprah jumps up Jennifer Aniston’s ass. The show taped yesterday, will air today, and as you would expect, the two were as gushy feely as they’ve always been. According to audience members, Jennifer’s words for the Brange were decidedly more kind and conciliatory than what she had to say in Vogue. Full Story

November 13, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 13, 2008 06:36:49 November 13, 2008 06:36:49

Heads up Vancouver: it’s Free Froyo Day! Froyo Swirl just opened in Yaletown – in the spirit of Pinkberry with a Canadian twist. Today between 11am and 5pm pop in and try it out FOR FREE! My favourite word! After twat. 820 Homer Street. Full Story

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Friday Night Gay? Yay! Ausiello reported yesterday that someone came out on Friday Night Lights last night.

Who was it? No! Don’t tell me! I have to know! Wait! I can’t!

UGH!

FNL is currently airing on DirecTV and will premiere on conventional television in January. Many of you have been cheating online, which is cool, but please… please don’t let it die. I’ve attached an incentive.

For those of you returning from holiday – scroll down to get caught up! New posts were added late yesterday and the day before.

Wednesday – blogging all day.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

The Great Australian Headline

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 12, 2008 15:39:00 November 12, 2008 15:39:00

This appeared in today’s Daily Telegraph in Australia. If you don’t want her infection, you don’t need the details about her diseased f*cking diseased party on New Year’s Eve. Because the headline is enough. While we’re at it though, can you believe this sh-t is Pay Per View online? For $55??? Who are the losers shelling out $55 to pay per view with Ebola stanky Hilton??? Thanks Lucy! To view the full article click here. Full Story

The Bluths are alive!!!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 12, 2008 14:55:41 November 12, 2008 14:55:41

Oh toying with our emotions! First they were all like, yeah yeah it’s coming back. They’ll be a movie. Then Michael Cera was like, no, I’m a movie star, I don’t want to be George Michael. But now… Just the other night… Jeffrey Tambor confirmed that It.Is.Happening. Full Story

Ghetto Tits sells in Greece

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 12, 2008 14:09:15 November 12, 2008 14:09:15

Every loser can launch a fashion line. Where does this money come from? In a busted economy too! So here’s Tara Reid, selling her ghetto tits ghetto skank uniform at some fashion show in Greece. I know you love it that her left breast is significantly lower than her right. And that it appears to be sloping towards the Mediterranean. Full Story

Edward > Zac

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 12, 2008 11:58:38 November 12, 2008 11:58:38

High School who? Exactly. It made a lot of money but the hype has been replaced. By Twilight. Twilight mall tours have resulted in fandemonium-related injuries, fangirls are losing their sh-t, fanmoms are leaving their children for hours for a glimpse at Robert Pattinson… and I’ve heard exclusively that Zac Efron is jealous. Full Story

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