March 19, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2008 06:41:54 March 19, 2008 06:41:54

Happy 14th Birthday to Emma in Calgary from Aunt Eydie! To Sarah with a discretionary dilemma. Give it 6 more weeks of WTF behaviour and get it out of your system. Exhaust every body part, every position. Because we are all stupid in our 20s anyway. After your birthday, take the discretion, ditch the douchebag… deal? For Susan in Squamish from your BFF Sally – bridging the distance with smut… am SO honoured! And keep on living my dream: love with a younger man, DJing in Whistler, and an entrepreneur too? Bra off and tits up, I’m saluting you. Full Story

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Dear Gossips,

No one believes Liz Rosenberg. Madonna’s publicist yesterday issued a statement intending to debunk recent reports that the “Ritchies” are on the verge of separation, the result of which has been the opposite. Instead the announcement has only created more speculation, not helped by the fact that the two haven’t been seen together publicly for weeks.

But who markets herself better than Madge? For 25 years she’s been marketing herself brilliantly. And Madge’s new album drops on April 29th. Is she playing us? More on that later.

A brand new Nicole/Keith photo opp! Of course in virgin white, of course on the beach! And of course, her lips look like they’ve been touched up!

Tuesday – posting throughout the day, remember to refresh!

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. Liv Tyler is not wasting blow. Liv’s been on vacation for a couple of months – resting, not working, word is she is looking and feeling gorgeous.

Love you President Bartlet

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 14:50:00 March 18, 2008 14:50:00

Martin Sheen was honoured last night with the Stella Adler Studio of Acting Marlon Brando Award. On the carpet Marlon was asked by Page Six to comment on his slag of an ex daughter in law and her plans to prostitute her children on reality tv. Full Story

Shelfy Back to Brown

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 14:26:00 March 18, 2008 14:26:00

Much better as a brunette. Here’s Jessica Biel, walking her dog, showing off her newly re-darkened natural locks after posing as a blonde for Easy Virtue. Check her out trying to “turn away” from the cameras… Ummm. Shelfy? Sit DOWN! As if she didn’t want to be photographed, like, one day after getting her hair coloured. Full Story

Leatherheads Exclusive Giveaway!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 14:16:00 March 18, 2008 14:16:00

Clooney is back in the director’s chair! And Renee Zellweger is squinting beside him! Plus… the hotness of John Krasinski – can you stand it? Leatherheads is due out in theatres on April 4th. Ohhhh… 04/04. Terrible numbers. Maybe you can help George out? He wants a box office smash. Full Story

More Golddigger Bitch Slaps

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 10:33:00 March 18, 2008 10:33:00

For those of you too busy or lazy to read through the entire judgment… more gems from the judge’s written decision on the McCartney Mills divorce. More incriminating details about Heather’s character, or lack thereof. Greedy, lying, conniving c-bomb. Thanks again C! You will note – for all her pontificating about her charity work… turns out she can’t produce any receipts. Full Story

The New Gwyneth

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 09:48:00 March 18, 2008 09:48:00

Gwyneth today at The Prince’s Trust & RBS Celebrate Success Awards in London owning her new hair. Love the messy waves. Love, love, love. Love that it’s not “done”. In fact, aside from the shoes, the new Gwyneth is the best Gwyneth we’ve seen in a while. Sleek and sophisticated and fresh and ready to get back to work. Full Story

When the Ex Moves On

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 09:25:00 March 18, 2008 09:25:00

It’s a good thing! And finally a piece of positive news for Tom Brady, pictured here in New York the other day out and about with Gisele. Although every day with Gisele must be a good day, there’s no way the Superbowl sting has subsided. No f*cking way. And spending most of his time in New York probably doesn’t help either. Full Story

Golddigger Slap in the Face

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 08:37:00 March 18, 2008 08:37:00

Is there any wonder why Heather Mills is universally despised? Heather Mills threw water on Fiona Shackleton in court yesterday. Shackleton is Paul McCartney’s divorce attorney. WATER. She threw water. In court. And she finds it hard to believe she’s hard to believe??? Still…it was Shackleton and of course Sir Paul who had the last laugh. Full Story

How I Met Your Chicken Fried Mother

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 08:28:49 March 18, 2008 08:28:49

Been a while since there was actually something not sad to say about Chicken Fried Stupid. But since Daddy’s come ‘round, Britney Spears has been forced into a state of less craziness and the improvement has been gradual but remarkable. She’s even working again and I’m sure you know, she’ll be guest starring on How I Met Your Mother on an episode that will air next week. Full Story

At Work Without Reese

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2008 07:51:11 March 18, 2008 07:51:11

It’s not the same, is it? Promoting a movie without the perfect wife, selling tickets on the strength of your carb face douchebaggery alone, hoping that the 17 year olds who pined for you 10 years ago will still find you attractive today… This is Ryan Phillippe’s new reality. Was refreshing though to see him in something other than a sweaty beater and sports shorts last night at the premiere of Stop Loss. Full Story