Sigh. Bump watch is my least favourite of all the gossip watches. Mostly because I don’t give a sh-t but also because most of the time it’s based on whether or not a woman happens to be bloated. Which isn’t exactly reliable scientific smut. Three months ago, Halle Berry went out for groceries and her stomach wasn’t concave – all of a sudden she was supposed to be expecting. Full Story
How long does it take to wash away a slutty history? If one used to sell for sex, when does that cease to become a blemish? Is there, like, a statute of limitations on a prostitution past? Or is it once a ho, always a ho? Kinda like Denise Richards? British rags are openly calling the golddigging dancer a “former hooker”, with allegations from a former event planner that Heather was paid to participate in orgies with billionaires in the early 90s. Full Story
Good signs and warning signs, it’s never easy with Britney. Girl is just so f&cking… dumb. Like I mean seriously stupid. Like learning impaired. Which accounts for my soft spot. Because I truly believe she’s too stupid to know, you know? Followed everywhere by the pappies this weekend – out for sushi several times, at the dance studio, stopping by Parc for a brief club hop only to dash out half and hour later… all positive developments. Full Story
According to fashion critics, Kate’s designs for Topshop suck ass, with a senior staffer at Barney’s calling her “a working class slag from a crap town” and dismissing her clothes as cheap imitations of items she’s worn in the past created by “real” style mavericks. Full Story
Navigating the gossip terrain is a tricky business. Celebrity spin, publicists feeding fake stories, weeding through the sales and the conspiracies – unless you’re a card carrying member of the MiniVan Majority, you probably want to be a bit more discerning with your smut, right? Especially since the rags will pretty much print anything. Full Story
Brad and Zahara out for ice cream, Angie waiting in the car, and somehow caught on camera by not one but at least 2 pappy agencies…amazing, init? Two weeks after Janice Min’s scathing report in Us Weekly about Angelina’s “twisted double life”, amid increasing speculation that their relationship is on the decline, that Brad is unhappy, that Angie is a terrible mother, the Pitts seem to have carefully orchestrated a random outing to illustrate that things are fine. Full Story
Many of you wrote yesterday deploring Naomi Watts’s bra-less appearance at the Tom Ford store opening the night before. Some called it “crude”, others decreed that “no pregnant should be without a bra” and even went so far as to compare her to Britney Spears.
Naomi Watts = Britney Spears?
Ah…no. Not even close.
Call me Cruise but I thought Naomi’s free tits looked kinda hot. Hot like Mother Fertility. Hot like she was just more comfortable that way. And since Naomi isn’t a famewhore like her BFF The Freeze, and since I’ve never been pregnant and since I never intend to be, since I can’t totally relate but I can imagine what it must be like to lug a bump around all day, I’m going to assume she was just more comfortable that way. That you may not have been but that she was. And that she chose to go out for a night on the town, grin and bear it with the fashionable and the pretentious but at the very least be comfortable doing so.
And for that, I love her even more.
Friday – live blogging, a new giveaway, and if it’s a slow day, perhaps reviving the Mailbag.
Have a great, great, great weekend. It’s NHL Playoff time in Canada…am headed to the game tonight. WITH my camera. Because Playoff time is Hockey Whore time.
Yours in gossip,
My husband LOVES The Office. Our PVR is stacked with episodes of The Office competing with episodes of Friday Night Lights. But I was slow to come around. Partly out of loyalty to Ricky Gervais – yes, I know he produces the American version – and partly because Steve Carrell freaks me out. Full Story
Eva Green, Audrey Tautou, now Emily Blunt… Euro brunettes are the hotness. Emily Blunt, here in Vancouver with boyfriend Michael Buble. She supported him at his album release party the other night and yesterday, False Creek, they had lunch at Provence where she was head to toe perfection. Her skin alone is making me mad with envy. Full Story
Helen Mirren is The Queen. An Oscar-winning performance that swept awards season and provides some insight into what Queen Elizabeth II is really like. Did you know she can drive? And does drive? And stomps around in wellies? The Queen DVD comes out on April 24th, I have five copies to give away. If you’re interested, send an email to Lainey@laineygossip. Full Story