The Real Biel

July 10, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 10, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

A few civilians had the opportunity to hang with Shelf Ass Jessica Biel very recently. Said she was lovely, that she talked about JT, that they are indeed a couple, and that she apparently pulled out a joint and they all smoked it. Still a massive famewhore but now I kinda like her a little more. At least she doesn’t have a pickle up her ass, you know? Full Story

Bullsh-t Like Beckham

July 10, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 10, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

They all believe their own bullsh-t. What’s amazing about Victoria is that as ludicrous as it is, her version of the truth, somehow she manages to keep a straight face…as is the case with her concrete tits. Not only does she claim they’re authentic, she also insists they measure only 32B. Full Story

The Disciples of Ebola

July 10, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 10, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Why will Hollywood Ebola live forever? What makes the deadly disease unkillable? Because of useless f&cking twats like this. Check it out – some loser from bumf&ck god knows where drags a 4 year old out to Paris Hilton’s house, waiting alongside the paps just to score a brief moment and a photo with The Virus, telling everyone that the child is Paris’s biggest fan. Full Story

Monday, July 9, 2007

Dear Gossips,

Madonna!

On entertainment and performance value, even two years from 50, Madge is still the platinum standard.

Looked great, sounded fierce, body crazy fit RUNNING on 4 inch Louboutins, the hottest dancers, the best variety, the sharpest choreography…and the Camel Toe. It was a perfect performance. PERFECT. So if you haven’t yet, you must YouTube.

Sorry ‘bout the late start today. Am knackered after a whirlwind one day trip to Calgary yesterday. Was too short a stay to get the full Cowboys experience but my love and admiration goes out to the city and its people: Calgary Stampede is a first class, world class event. Hoping for a longer visit next year but will be back in Calgary in 2 weeks for a killer party. Details to follow.

Monday, live blogging, check back often. Am writing as quickly as I can.

Yours in gossip,
Lainey

PS. Eva Longoria got married… have you heard???

Not for Me

July 9, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 9, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

… but judging from your emails after Equus, definitely for some of you. Thing is, he’s like a son to me. Or at least a much younger brother. After reading Harry and then watching Harry, especially in the latest film, watching him grow, feeling ridiculously proud of his maturity, it’s hard to picture anything but a hug. Full Story

Three Whiskers: New Look, New Piece?

July 9, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 9, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Three Whiskers Orlando Bloom is rockin’ a new three whisker moustache…you likey? Please. Daniel Radcliffe inspires more quiver and even that is seriously marginal. So here’s Orly leaving a party the other night, trailed by a girl the pappies are calling his new romance. Apparently they went home together after getting “intimate” inside the club. Full Story

Thin & Tan > Young

July 9, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 9, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

The Posh Philosophy: always choose skinny and orange over wrinkle-free and healthy. Here they are, the Beckhams at the tail end of their French vacation before making their Los Angeles debut later this week. A rare occasion: both look sh-t together – he with his two tone head to facial hair mismatch, she and her obvious sunburn. Full Story

A Model Thing?

July 9, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 9, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I interviewed a model in Calgary yesterday. Watch on eTalk later this week. Her name is Heather Marks, considered among the top tier of girls in the industry today. Like many of the best, Heather is a freak of nature…and I mean that in the best way possible. Full Story

Can’t do Glam

July 9, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 9, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sienna Miller for Valentino? WAY off base. Because Sienna can only do casual. Casual one look boho strolling around London… for sure. But high glam in the designer’s signature red? Even the most hardcore Miller fan wouldn’t disagree – she looked horrid this weekend at V’s anniversary celebration. Full Story

Uma & Valentino

July 9, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 9, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Valentino celebrated 45 years this weekend with a star-studded, extravagant, seemingly interminable celebration consisting of party after party after fashion show. One of the lowlights had to be Sienna Miller – more on that later. Among the highlights, as usual – Uma Thurman who chose light and pale shades throughout the festivities as illustrated by the three showings attached. Full Story