Ashton Mayer

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 07:18:30 April 14, 2008 07:18:30

Did you watch SNL? First and final sketches were my favourites. And Kristin Wiig is the sh*t. Angelina Jolaire… remember that? Hee. So Ashton hosted, was competent, and also so so so hot. Because when Ashton shaves, Ashton is gorgeous. And he looks amazing in clothes. Perfect pants, shirts that fit well, hair that works messy, hair that works neat. Full Story

Name a Funnier Couple

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 07:14:00 April 14, 2008 07:14:00

Can you? Amy Poehler and Will Arnett (a Canadian!) last night at an autism benefit in a rare red carpet appearance. They say Amy’s days on SNL are numbered – not because they don’t want to keep her, but because they can’t keep her. Just like they couldn’t keep the others: Eddie Murphy, Adam Sandler, Tina Fey…the list goes on. Full Story

Rumey’s Little Waist and New Friends

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 06:56:45 April 14, 2008 06:56:45

Rumer went shopping the other day to show off her bouncy breasts accentuated by a very small waist. And don’t call my Rumey a butterface! My Rumey has good angles! And in person she’s actually almost cute! Rumey also showed up in New York on Saturday night to support her MOD (my other dad) Ashton Kutcher after his hosting gig on SNL. Full Story

Newlyweds Play Coy

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 06:51:22 April 14, 2008 06:51:22

Beyonce and Jay-Z showed up courtside at a basketball game the other day and continued to play coy about their wedding. Jay was ring-less and B kept her hand hidden…not that there’s any question about what happened on 4/4/8. Still… am all over the fact that they won’t talk about it. Full Story

Replacing KatE with Kate

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 04:39:04 April 14, 2008 04:39:04

Rumour has it, Victoria Beckham has had enough of Katie Holmes, unhappy with the fact that her protégé has now become more posh. UK tabloids are also reporting that Tom has chilled to his wife’s friendship with Mrs Beckham, supposedly because Victoria is a bad “thin” influence, subversively pressuring Katie to lose too much weight. Full Story

Short and Blind

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 04:36:00 April 14, 2008 04:36:00

Which lead singer of a band that’s all about giving back and clean living and saving the world abandoned his wife and children for a woman he met online last summer? Which tv starlet was so hard up for “happy” the other day, she couldn’t stop twitching, resulting in too many wasted takes? Full Story

Media Idol – I Need Your Vote!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 04:26:00 April 14, 2008 04:26:00

I regret this already…but it’s for a good cause. It’s for Covenant House Vancouver. And don’t be one of those losers who says you don’t live in Vancouver so why should you care about street kids in Vancouver. Because the fact is, a large percentage of youth who are homeless in Vancouver come from all parts of Canada and even the United States. Full Story

April 14, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 04:20:23 April 14, 2008 04:20:23

Am even more disorganised than usual so if I’ve missed a shout-out request, please know I’m sorry and please do re-send. A thousand apologies! Happy belated Birthday Nancy! Thanks so much for reading my smut for so long and for pimping it to your friends! Have heard that last year was tough but have also heard you were a rock. Full Story

Friday, April 11, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Is it sad how giddy I was last night over the return of 30 Rock and The Office? Now if there was a show about being “friends” with Tina Fey, I’d be lining up overnight to audition. Why isn’t Tina Fey going to the White House Correspondents’ Dinner?

Oh right. Because that sack of useless skank Pamela Anderson can make a more meaningful contribution there. WTF???

It’s Friday – am moving this weekend so while you’re out having fun, think of me ass deep in dust and boxes.

Yours in gossip,


PS. Kristen Bell is not cranky. Also not Maggie Gyllenhaal.

PPS. I have Calgary withdrawal.

Sarah Summers in Italy

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 11, 2008 09:42:00 April 11, 2008 09:42:00

Sarah Larson has just signed a new modeling contract – at 28 years old, it’s a rare accomplishment. She strutted down the catwalk the other day in Vegas for a charity fashion show and was asked by reporters about how she met George Clooney, how long they’ve known each other, and what she has planned next. Full Story