The Virus

June 7, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 7, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Is her disease the medical reason? Was Hollywood Ebola wreaking havoc among inmates? Because that’s what the authorities are saying – that she hasn’t been “released”, only reassigned. After extensive meetings with medical personnel, Paris has been ordered to house arrest and fitted with an ankle monitor… Apparently poor Paris couldn’t hack it inside. Full Story

The Egomaniac

June 7, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 7, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

So he’s a music mogul now – has his own label, can sign his own talent, a major player in the industry at the tender age of 26…very impressive. Not so impressive: the Pipsqueak’s raging ego. It’s all about him, it’s all about what he brings, it’s all about his midas touch, and it may be indisputable but it doesn’t make it classy. Full Story

The Return

June 7, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 7, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Changed, reformed, repentant? Hardly. The bible clutching, the white wardrobe, the self help books, the introspection – all a ruse designed to reposition Paris Hilton as her virus mutates into another form. Which is why prison and everything leading up to prison was so enjoyable while it lasted. Full Story

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Dear Gossips,

Went out with a dear girlfriend last night after leaving work late – one of those nights when you talk and talk and still you haven’t covered everything and you look down and suddenly it’s 4 hours later and you’re tired but not really because the thing about friends like those are that they let you face the bad about yourself without making you feel badly about yourself and of course the good stuff just gets better…

Real girls do that for other girls.

Girls do not sell knife-posing pics to the press nor do they allow you to dress like a tranny and get pissed on, literally and figuratively, by an indecisive rocker who can’t decide between his balls and his brain.

Clearly Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Simpson have no friends. Maybe Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Simpson should be friends with each other?

Another occasion for Pitt Porn… Brad and Angelina at the Oceans LA premiere last night – see below. So much stimulation, I can’t handle it.

Wednesday, live blogging all day, check back often…

Yours in gossip,
Lainey

Rock Bottom: The Scrunchie

June 6, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 6, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Please….someone…anyone in that facility, please please please take a photo. PLEASE!!! Poor Paris Go Boo Boo!! New details emerging on Ebola’s life behind bars and would you believe…she had to be subjected to wearing A SCRUNCHIE! “A scrunchie made from an elastic sock!!!” I can’t…I can’t…I can’t tell you how hard I just laughed. Full Story

The New Sienna still not iconic

June 6, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 6, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I like the new Sienna. The new Sienna is working hard, she is focused, she is making a movie she is proud of. And clean is always better than not clean, know what I mean? The new Sienna is also trying to cut a lower profile, starting of course with the wardrobe, meant to convey that transition...another leap in her iconic style journey? Please. Full Story

Shocker! Dina Lohan is a Fraud!

June 6, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 6, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Big f*cking surprise. Hollywood’s most exploitative mother was supposed to be a former Rockette and a some time actress before getting married and having children on which to dump her unrealised ambitions. Problem is – Radio City Music Hall begs to differ, and the folks there aren’t exactly thrilled that she’s been trying to beef up her resumé with their name. Full Story

Jen’s new cover

June 6, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 6, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

After a slump last year, Stephen Huvane has come out swinging. Brilliant, brilliant manoeuvres of late and a formidable sparring partner for the Pitts – matching them move for move so far after getting his ass handed to him last year. Love it. Last week we were teased – Jennifer Aniston spotted with a new dude, reported by People. Full Story

Posh: Paris, Karl, and green stuff from the sea

June 6, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 6, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It was Karl Lagerfeld who designed Victoria’s tongue-in-cheek style atrocity last night at the UK Glamour Awards. Of course it was. Look at those gloves. Only Karl would approve of that kind of “upstagery”, only the militant Karl and his missing bitch beating fan would appreciate that even Posh has “fat days” – days when she doesn’t feel like trying on clothes, even at Chanel, because of some embarrassing (though imaginary) bloat. Full Story

Vanity Fair: The Africa Covers

June 6, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 6, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

“These are incredible people of our time, involved in this effort to make Africa better, to get Africa self-sufficient, and to try to get rid of aids on the continent." Shot by Annie Leibovitz on 20 different covers – 21 major names posing for Africa like a “visual chain letter” promoting awareness and discussion about the future of Africa. Full Story

Porn and Perfection

June 6, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 6, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s his hand on her ass…it’s the way his hand can never seem to leave her ass. It’s the easy way they walk together, not practised 12 thousand times down the hall in front of a mirror but with the kind of sexy familiarity that can only be perfected between the sheets. And how. Full Story