Gwyneth According to Mom

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 16, 2008 06:10:50 January 16, 2008 06:10:50

The paps caught up with Blythe Danner yesterday and asked her about Gwyneth’s hospitalisation. As you can see from Blythe’s blithe response in the video Gwyneth is fine. In fact, she’s “fabulous”, no longer in the hospital, and … Not pregnant. Full Story

Bootycalling on his Blog

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 16, 2008 06:00:23 January 16, 2008 06:00:23

Hate to gloat but… It was reported last week that John Mayer the pissing douche was on the loose, having split from Minka Kelly. This is what I wrote at the time: And now that Jessica Simpson is all over Tony Romo, maybe John is feeling a little slighted that it only took her 6 months to get over him. Full Story

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Had to stay up last night to watch Katie Holmes on Letterman. It’s official…the girl has no, as in zero, personality. More on that later.

And never a dull Chicken Fried moment. No court appearance for Britney, no visitation for Britney. But she did manage to drop in at Rite Aid and at church where she asked for a blessing. Perhaps she should ask the GMD. After all, he believes he can save her. And there’s video to prove it.

Tuesday, am online all day, keep refreshing! And scroll down for late articles you may have missed yesterday.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. A tearful Tokyo farewell to Linda M from Lesley who is leaving to go back to Minnesota. Miss you!

PPS. Does Jennifer Aniston pay Asian-haters??? But doesn’t that mean she supports Asian-haters??? Details coming…

Chicken Fried Dissention!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 15, 2008 13:02:01 January 15, 2008 13:02:01

There is dissention deep within the Spears camp! As you know, Britney has been inseparable from her paparazzo lover Adnan for the last 2 weeks. Now Britney’s close friend/cousin/former enabler/single white female Alli Simms is cutting him down! In a new interview with Us Weekly, Alli tells the magazine that the dude freaks her out and that she’s worried that A-Fed’s plans for Britney are incongruent with any hope that she turns her sh*t around: "I don’t know him. Full Story

Papa Perv F*cks Up Again

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 15, 2008 10:50:52 January 15, 2008 10:50:52

Jessica Simpson’s career is in deep sh*t. She can’t sell a movie, she can’t sell pop music so she’s trying her hand at country music… but now Texas hates her ass. And if her home state hates her ass, how the hell is she going to move a country record? Blame Joe Simpson. Full Story

Shelf Ass can’t do Period Pieces

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 15, 2008 10:20:38 January 15, 2008 10:20:38

Edward Norton’s The Illusionist could have been a much stronger feature if not for its poor choice in leading lady. Face it –Jessica Biel is not Keira Knightley, or Natalie Portman, or Kirsten Dunst. And she cannot pull off those “period piece” looks…to say nothing of that atrocious accent. Full Story

OK! says she’s OK!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 15, 2008 00:00:00 January 15, 2008 00:00:00

OK! Magazine is reporting that my Gwyneth has returned home after being hospitalised yesterday. Said her publicist Stephen Huvane: "Gwyneth is fine and at home - we are not commenting further.”Funny that coming from Huvane, who always says he’s not commenting any further but always does comment further, especially as it relates to Jennifer Aniston, also his client. Full Story

FILA Ebola

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 15, 2008 08:45:23 January 15, 2008 08:45:23

If I were on the board at FILA, I’d be cashing in my shares in getting the f&ck out. Because in hiring Hollywood Ebola Paris Hilton as a spokesvirus, the brand has officially been infected. Which means their products are now contaminated and stocks will eventually plummet. Trust. Because remember – Paris Hilton’s black hole vagina spreads her disease unmercifully… killing everyone and everything in her path. Full Story

Get Well Gwyneth

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 15, 2008 08:11:12 January 15, 2008 08:11:12

My Gwynnie!!! My Gwynnie is sick! Gwyneth Paltrow was taken to hospital yesterday, slumped over in a wheelchair pushed by Chris Martin. Her publicist is calling it a “personal matter”. Still... there are positive signs.  Apparently a baggie with macriobiotic treehugger food was brought to her later on from some organics store later on. Full Story

Jennifer Aniston Pays Racists???

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 15, 2008 00:00:00 January 15, 2008 00:00:00

As I reported yesterday, Jennifer Aniston is currently shooting in Vancouver and is constantly attended to by 4 bodyguards who’ve come along with her for the duration of filming. Not only do they protect her, they also make sure she’s not photographed when she doesn’t want to be. Because Jennifer Aniston is a serious movie actor. Full Story

RoboBride on Letterman

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 15, 2008 07:33:22 January 15, 2008 07:33:22

Had to watch Katie Holmes on Letterman last night if only to see what was underneath yesterday’s red coat. It was short and it was white and Posh needs to train her on how to walk in those heels because the whole look fell apart as soon as she moved her legs. The problem, poor thing, is that she doesn’t know what to do when she doesn’t have to slouch, so accustomed is she to compensating for the GMD’s height restriction. Full Story

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