April 11, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 11, 2008 08:08:56 April 11, 2008 08:08:56

Happy 30th Julie B in Stratford! I’ve heard about your smut and martini nights with Chris and Pam and Julie M. Hopefully you’ll all be able to get together for another one soon. Happy 30th Jane R of Ottawa! Love that you’re not accepting gifts at the party tomorrow. Love that you’re only accepting food bank donations. Full Story

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Site issues from yesterday should be all sorted out – sorry it was such a drag. Smut is fully functional today but update your bookmarks!

It’s Spring… love is in the air. New love, old love, fake love.

Thursday – am online all day, remember to refresh.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. Natalie Portman is not taking coke for the pain.

PPS. Christina Ricci is not cranky.

When Bad Hair…

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2008 13:34:00 April 10, 2008 13:34:00

Happens to a supermodel. It’s a testament to Christy’s undisputed gorgessity that her face remains unaffected. Because when most of us wear bad hair, everything else goes to sh*t too. But still… Not even Christy Turlington can pull off this half mullet. WTF??? This is Christy yesterday at the FilmAid International Power of Film Gala last night in New York with locks that belong on a head to toe denim-clad chainsmoking gravel voiced hick from a bumf&ck small town with missing teeth minding a corner store alongside a husband who might be her brother. Full Story

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Someone Loves My Rumey

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2008 12:27:40 April 10, 2008 12:27:40

See? I’m telling you. In person, she’s not that… unappealing. In person, she’s actually kinda cute. At least a few boys think so. And she’s been linked with enough of them to prove it. Consider this: no one will go near Lindsay Lohan anymore. But Rumer Willis is not off limits. Full Story

Kate Hudson and Dangling Dicks

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2008 12:06:00 April 10, 2008 12:06:00

As gorgeous as she is, sometimes Kate Hudson just flies off the rails, you know what I mean? Check it out – Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey in London for the premiere of Fool’s Gold. I have no idea what the f&ck she’s wearing. It’s atrocious. And gawdy. And those two ropes hanging off her sleeves with the tassels… they remind me of China’s Empress Dowager Cixi – that old bat who you always associate with eunuchs. Full Story

The Hills: the Rolling Stone Photo Shoot

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2008 11:00:52 April 10, 2008 11:00:52

Believe it or not, the girls of The Hills have landed a Rolling Stone cover. Exclusive details from the shoot to follow… Big surprise: Heidi is NOT the biggest bitch among the four girls. Well, she is. But not in the way you’d expect. More on that later. The biggest bitch according to my sources is Whitney, followed in close second by Audrina. Full Story

Warner/Flare Juno Party Swag Giveaway!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2008 10:07:29 April 10, 2008 10:07:29

So we went to the Warner Music Canada/Flare party on Sunday night after the Junos because… I’m not going to lie – we heard they had the best gift bags. My swag is your swag, remember? I’m keeping the chocolate though. By the time I came home, it was late and I had to blog so I ate all the Cadbury that came with the gifts. Full Story

Natalie & Lindsay

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2008 09:01:00 April 10, 2008 09:01:00

Since this morning’s post about Natalie Portman’s new relationship with Devendra Banhart, a few of his hardcore fans have emailed insisting that A. he really is beautiful and B. he truly is an artist. I won’t argue with beautiful. Beautiful is many things to many people. The only thing it is NOT is Tori Spelling and Donatella Versace. Full Story

Nicole’s Nose and Breasts

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2008 08:36:05 April 10, 2008 08:36:05

I have a nose thing. And I’ve just realised Nicole Richie has a killer nose! LOVE her nose! Here she is with her dad and little sister at the ASCAP Pop Awards last night in Hollywood looking so beautiful and so healthy. It’s been three months since Little Harlow was born. Three months and Nicole has not reverted to starvation mode. Full Story

Live Like Karl

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2008 08:04:00 April 10, 2008 08:04:00

I love him. When he’s a mean motherf*cker I love him even more. How can you NOT love Karl Lagerfeld??? Jezebel has just excerpted a new article with Karl from Hong Kong’s prestige magazine in which Karl honours us with a glimpse into his mind. Full Story