A Beater or Nothing

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2007 00:00:00 June 12, 2007 00:00:00

My cousin Cat brought this up a few weeks ago: what’s with the constant beaters? Does Ryan Phillippe own anything other than tank tops? Call me Cruise but with the exception of David Beckham, a man in a tank means instant de-quiver. Am all about the t-shirt. A just fit not too tight t-shirt with a print. Full Story

Quiver when Wet

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2007 00:00:00 June 12, 2007 00:00:00

Daniel Craig in the water shooting scenes for a new movie he’s producing on location in South Africa. If you have a pulse and you’ve seen Casino Royale, the wet shirt will undoubtedly bring back memories of the shower. Don’t tell me you don’t remember the shower. After getting all manly man and killing his assassins, he finds his girl shaken and distraught sitting fully clothed in the shower. Full Story

Flats Are Evil

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2007 00:00:00 June 12, 2007 00:00:00

Along with My Concrete Tits are Real, this must be her mantra: Victoria Beckham simply canNOT wear flats. She will eschew them always, even in favour of Nurse Shoes with a Wedge. Look at them. Tell me those aren’t nurse shoes with a wedge. Here’s Posh throwing out the first pitch at the Dodger game yesterday. Full Story

Who Will Be Queen?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2007 00:00:00 June 12, 2007 00:00:00

Angelina Jolie surprised everyone after Cannes in A Mighty Heart, kicking off Oscar speculation very early in the season with an unexpected bid and the Pitt publicity machine behind her full force, putting her up against Cate Blanchett’s second turn as Elizabeth in the Golden Age, long considered to one the one to beat. Full Story

Monday, June 11, 2007

Dear Gossips,

Back in Vancouver, happy to be home if only for a few days… New York and London next week!

So at press time, Barbara Walters is getting ready to appear on The View this morning to discuss her impromptu phone call with Paris Hilton yesterday. Barbara was apparently on the phone with Kathy Hilton when Paris beeped in from prison. Paris said she wanted to chat, called Barbara collect, and explained that she has now found the Lord, that she is tired of “playing dumb”, that her old act was no longer “cute”, and that she plans to emerge from prison a changed person, ready to “make a difference.”

Indeed. As we all know, that sh-t is unkillable. Paris, like all deadly viruses, will survive jail. And she will especially survive a comfortable room in the prison infirmary, with a telephone at her disposable. How luxe. But while I don’t doubt that Hollywood Ebola will rage back stronger than ever, the stink today surrounds Barbara Walters – Barbara Walters the obsequious, who will undoubtedly fellate the Hilton family for the first exclusive, who will likely interview Paris without the hardhitting questions, with her head shoved so far up that black hole, just like it was at the height of the Rosie vs Donald bloodbath when she chose not to back up her girl but catered instead to the whim of her wealthy "friend"…if you ask me, Barbara Walters is the worst representative on a show supposed to represent women.

And I’ve no doubt, given her ties to the Hiltons, Walters will lead the Paris positivity parade… Beware Barbara Walters: the old broad has been infected.

Monday – blogging real time all day, check back often for fresh posts.

Yours in gossip,
Lainey

PS. To Wendy and Ellery in Calgary – all my love and best wishes. Am hoping along with you that that baby girl stays safely tucked away for at least a few more weeks. Stay relaxed….will try to bring my best smut to help, Lainey

PPS. Tori Spelling and KFed Jr in Toronto this week attended to by a personal photographer/paparazzo seen following them around on several occasions by accident on purpose. Unfortunately, only one photo of their promotional visit has been published...snort. Master of Goldiggery gets no love in Canada? Eat that Junior…

The Best Dress with Pockets

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2007 00:00:00 June 11, 2007 00:00:00

I’m telling you, Rachel Zoe for Cameron Diaz is a resounding smash hit. Grudging sigh. Anyway, here’s Cam tonight in London for Shrek wearing a dress to kill for and slit pockets along the side – love dresses with pockets! Except usually they’re of the baby doll variety on a full-ish skirt. Full Story

Pip & Zorro in London

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2007 00:00:00 June 11, 2007 00:00:00

Not sure why but this photo kills me. Only Antonio Banderas, you know what I mean? Only he could pull off that pucker. They are in London for the big splash premiere of Shrek. All of them, minus Eddie Murphy, on hand to take their film to the UK including Cam and Mike Myers but it’s the chemistry between JT and Zorro that is cracking me up the most. Full Story

More than just the music…

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2007 00:00:00 June 11, 2007 00:00:00

Kelly Clarkson’s new record is getting critically hammered. Off the success of her last effort, the expectation was that she’d take the same formula and churn out another list of 4 or 5 hits. Instead, Kelly decided to write her own stuff, even if it meant staying off the charts and pissing off Clive Davis. Full Story

The Smut Soiree Roots Giveaway!!!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2007 00:00:00 June 11, 2007 00:00:00

Warning: Shameless self promotion – suffer through it though and you’ll get to the contest. With just over a week’s notice, the girls of The Society pulled off a blast as always and with help from Perrier-Jouet for the champagne and of course the lovely Raymond at the Roots Flagship Store on Bloor for the venue and the discount for all guests. Full Story

Homo Saves the Karma Face?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2007 00:00:00 June 11, 2007 00:00:00

She homewrecked another woman’s baby daddy, suffered for it personally and professionally, walked around looking like ass for the better part of 3 years with unmistakable Karma Face…but since breaking up with Billy Crudup and taking up with Hugh Dancy the maybe gaybe Claire Danes has experienced somewhat of a resurgence. Full Story

Canada’s Walk of Fame

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2007 00:00:00 June 11, 2007 00:00:00

Covered the carpet on Saturday night for eTalk at the Walk of Fame. For all you Nickelback fans out there, the boys surprised everyone and showed up in Armani tuxes, significant others on their arms, very respectable and respectFUL. Was nice to see rock superstars getting excited about meeting legends from other industries. Full Story