Farewell in Victory

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 18, 2007 00:00:00 June 18, 2007 00:00:00

Quite a way to cap off his European career – after getting dumped by England and benched for the early part of the season, Becks regained form and became a key part of his team’s championship run, inspiring talk yet again of repping his home country for Euro qualifiers and possibly at Euro 2008 in Austria and Switzerland. Full Story

Friday, June 15, 2007

Dear Gossips,

Justin said Wha????

You will LOVE, LOVE, LOVE his words for the Shelf Ass. And so what if it was printed in an unreliable British tabloid?

Angelina Jolie interview with Larry King – I’m sorry, I have no idea what she said. Because I was too busy laughing at Larry King. The man is a geriatric BUFFOON! And he needs to join Barbara Walters beside a pool in Palm Beach where they can natter away at each other for the rest of their lives!

Seriously…it was pure comedy. Angie’d be goin’ off about shooting emotionally charged scenes, about Mariane Pearl and her indomitable spirit, and suddenly old Larry interjects with the most inane questions ever. And grunting at the oddest moments. Like at one point he asked her about filming the pivotal scene when Pearl finds out her husband has been murdered. Jolie explained what it was like in that house, on set, how the entire crew was gutted about the fact that they were interpreting something so terrible, so terrifying that had actually happened to an actual person…and she gives this detailed, sensitive answer and the next thing know, Larry jumps in with…

Yeah so how many takes did you have to do?

Killed me. Best comedy ever… The man is barely surviving on the fumes of his career.

Friday, live blogging, check back often for fresh posts.

Yours in gossip,
Lainey

It’s Working!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 15, 2007 00:00:00 June 15, 2007 00:00:00

She WILL be a star. I mean Rumer Willis of course. Rumer who wants so badly to be one. Rumer born to Bruce and Demi, who hangs with Lindsay and pines for the flossy flossy life and everything that comes along with it. Rumer who is now a regular at Winstons and Teddys but claims not to do drugs… Rumer who is now capturing the interest of the pappies… Now Rumer has a job. Full Story

This Is Why

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 15, 2007 00:00:00 June 15, 2007 00:00:00

Said it time and again – the reason Johnny Depp is not on the Freebie Five is because Johnny Depp is a Lifetime. More than just one night of raucous rockin’ of your headboard, with Johnny, why and how would you say goodbye? Check it out - a clip from Julia of Johnny promoting Pirates in the Land of Hello Kitty, with Junior Hello Kitties, at once absurd and yet adorable, Johnny the guest of honour attending a children’s performance meticulously choreographed and rehearsed on his behalf. Full Story

Pregnant for Freedom?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 15, 2007 00:00:00 June 15, 2007 00:00:00

Rumours have been swirling for a week or so now – that Nicole Richie is pregnant, based first on a photo of her with a bulgy belly (always a reliable indication) and then because some tabloid pushed the story forward. Ever the clever publicity whore, Nicole has remained silent on the issue, much in the same way she remains silent on most of her issues knowing more people will talk about them if she doesn’t talk about it them herself. Full Story

Three Boys and a Douche

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 15, 2007 00:00:00 June 15, 2007 00:00:00

Turtle is missing but here’s the Piv and darling Kevin Dillon and Adrian Grenier at the premiere of the Entourage Season 4 last night. Then of course there’s that loser Kevin Connolly. The same Kevin Connolly too good for interviews but not too good to stand around watching his colleagues graciously doing their jobs. Full Story

Blame the Man

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 15, 2007 00:00:00 June 15, 2007 00:00:00

Widely criticised yesterday for trying to control the press, Angelina Jolie revealed on Jon Stewart that it was a move made by her lawyer and her representatives and not something she knew about. As you would expect, her attorney has also stepped forward to admit that he went overboard in his attempt to protect his candid client and that she in no way had anything to do with trying to get members of the media to sign a contract prohibiting them from asking personal questions and saying negative things about her. Full Story

Posh Goes to Barneys

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 15, 2007 00:00:00 June 15, 2007 00:00:00

Launched her denim line in NYC yesterday – as you can see, Victoria brought the full-on Posh. Love how she has to jam her feet into all her shoes, love how she’s now adopted the Celine Dion Lunge as part of her signature pose, love how you could stick a sausage in her mouth and not get lipstick smeared on the sides, and especially love her ski jump nose. Full Story

Shelf Ass Who???

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 15, 2007 00:00:00 June 15, 2007 00:00:00

Pip has a HUUUUUGE ego. And most of the time, his ego is total Rossum. But on occasion, especially when his ego doesn’t appreciate getting trumped by an overzealous publicity team for a B List actress, Pipsqueak’s ego is extremely entertaining. Full Story

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Dear Gossips,

So they’ve finally removed Paris Hilton from that cushy little room at the infirmary and transferred her back to Lynnwood where she’ll likely serve out the remainder of her sentence in solitary, on a hard little bed hopefully with her head beside a festering toilet.

Our last days of joy before her disease lashes out in freedom, stronger than ever, with that greedy little fool Barbara Walters shoved half way up her ass. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Sorry… have been distracted the last few days trying to get over a new book and it’s time for a new recommendation anyway. The Post Birthday World by Lionel Shriver – an extremely uncomfortable read, as is the case with everything else she writes including of course We Need to Talk About Kevin. She has that gift of sneaking up on you, subtly forcing you to confront the worst parts of yourself, the parts so easy to suppress during a dinner party as you collectively rage against the common enemy only to realise later on that you have more in common with it than you think. Definitely NOT a beach read but a read that stays with you for ages.

Thursday, posting all day, refresh browser often.

Yours in gossip,
Lainey

PS. Thanks to what seems like the entire city of Calgary for the thorough, insightful description of Cowboys. Hot girls who rub up against dude for big tips – as much at $10K during Stampede – and who apparently get half a boob job paid for if they stay six months … sounds like my kind of place. Am headed to Calgary late July…will have to drop in.

Posh: A New York City Stroll

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 14, 2007 00:00:00 June 14, 2007 00:00:00

I went for a walk with the dog yesterday through the forest. My legs haven’t been shaved in 3 days, I have two zits on my chin that I can’t stop picking, and wore the wrong underwear so I had to keep picking my wedge. However, I am not shooting a reality tv show. Leaving her hotel this afternoon for a “walk” in the park, trailed by cameras for her one hour special, here’s Victoria dressed for the occasion. Full Story