Ugly on Purpose

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 09:50:59 October 19, 2007 09:50:59

It’s been about two weeks, hasn’t? Since my Rumer’s made a blip on the gossip radar? Sounds about right. Which is why she showed up at some event last night looking like THIS. Like all the ugly atoms in her body migrated to her head and exploded in her hair. I mean I know I’m in the minority, I know most of you would believe this is the spawn of Donatella Versace… But my Rumey’s look is distinctive. Full Story

Two Spice Landing

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 00:00:00 October 19, 2007 00:00:00

The Spice Girls reunion tour is only 6 weeks ago, with kick off scheduled in Vancouver on December 2nd. As a warm up, the Spices will be performing at the Victoria Secret fashion show on November 14th that will air on December 4th which means the girls have less than a month to go to get their asses in gear. Full Story

Let it Begin

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 08:36:17 October 19, 2007 08:36:17

The always impeccable Cate Blanchett in Rome promoting The Golden Age yesterday. You know what you’re thinking. Word is, from several sources, indeed she is. But enough baby bump boredom. How about those wedges? Love, love, love. source Full Story

Sequins & Chucks

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 08:25:51 October 19, 2007 08:25:51

My soul dies a little every time I have to compliment Avril Lavigne. But as mentioned the other day, while her personality is the douchest, Avril’s style is the cutest. And style is all about individuality. Check her out last night at the MTV Latin America Music awards in an adorable strapless sequin, not paired with heels (which anyone could have done) but with matching tricked out chucks. Full Story

Always at the Mall

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 08:14:54 October 19, 2007 08:14:54

There actually IS a glass ceiling for women like Tara Reid. Because although she looks clean for a change and doesn’t initially seem as though she’s fresh off a gangbang, the hint of a gangbang still always lurks underneath no matter how hard she tries to pull it together. Here’s Tara at the premiere of Reservation Road last night no doubt trying to find her way into Joaquin Phoenix’s drunk ass pants. Full Story

Copycat Seinfeld…but will Oprah get revenge?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 00:00:00 October 19, 2007 00:00:00

Yes…she’s a scheming golddigging bitch…but I kinda love Jessica Seinfeld. So sinfully manipulative it’s delicious. And somehow she has entranced Jerry Seinfeld. He is completely addicted to her. Saw her at Cannes – as put together as anyone you’ve ever seen, and even better than KFed Junior at playing the doting wife, popping out 3 children in quick succession, and immediately looking picture perfect. Full Story

The Alba Demon: Losing It

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 07:12:19 October 19, 2007 07:12:19

Almost universally hailed as one of Hollywood’s sexiest girls, Jessica Alba’s career is based solely on the fact that …well…she’s hot. But is she hot... STILL??? Check her out last night at the Padres Contra el Cancer"s 7th annual "El Sueno de Esperanza" benefit gala looking head heavy and bottom stick with shiny skin, a rather large forehead, and an almost ordinary everything else. Full Story

RoboBride in NYC

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 06:59:49 October 19, 2007 06:59:49

The GMD and his Katie have left Germany, returning stateside to kickstart Tom’s promotional tour for Lions for Lambs which opens November 9th – his first picture with the newly resurrected United Artists and if all goes well, an Oscar hopeful. It’s really too bad the timing of that book, non? Hee. Full Story

Quick Fitness

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 06:43:17 October 19, 2007 06:43:17

I need to take up Tango. After only 5 days working her ass off, literally, at the dance studio, Lindsay Lohan’s body is looking the hotness. And healthy too! Crazier still…she’s not yet been seen on the club circuit… although the weekend has arrived. No matter – yesterday she was clean. Full Story

Weirdsville in Toronto

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2007 06:40:14 October 19, 2007 06:40:14

Scott Speedman is a local boy. Met him at Sundance last January and again during TIFF – he’s gorgeous, even under that thick mound of facial hair. And he’s also soooo nice. Scott’s new movie Weirdsville is now screening the Carlton Cinema. Twenty free passes are being provided to LaineyGossip. Full Story

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Dear Gossips,

Word is Heather Mills has given Paul McCartney a £50 million ultimatum: pay me a £50 lump sum upfront with instalments of £3 million per year and I’ll shut up. Otherwise, I will unleash my Golddigging Mastery all over your ass in court and continue to the spread the lies.

See? It was never about telling the “truth” and talking about her “remarkable life”. It was about extorting him for as much as possible and using the child in between them to force him to concede. The child and her bum leg.

Of course this is a woman who is insisting on showing up for their settlement meetings with a crutch in plain view…even though a few short months ago she was gamely twirling around on a dance floor on American television.

Heather Mills is a treacherous, manipulative genius. For that she should be recognised.

Thursday – am posting all day… check back often.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. Ken Paves is not leaking secrets.