The Daily Gorgessity: Gwen Stefani

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 22, 2007 12:00:00 January 22, 2007 12:00:00

She has that quality, you know? She can wear anything, no matter how weird, how off the page, Gwen makes it hers, Gwen makes it work, and for the most part, Gwen pushes that privilege as far as she can, preferring to play unique over safe each and every time. Love her for it. But there are those rare occasions, those appearances few and far between, when Gwen will eschew the offbeat for the norm, and make even MORE of an impact in the process…which is what happened at the NRJ Awards this weekend. Full Story

Alyssa Milano: the go-to rebound

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 22, 2007 12:00:00 January 22, 2007 12:00:00

I’m told she had a pretty serious boyfriend as of December and they were still together at Christmas but apparently Alyssa Milano was with Justin Timberlake in Vegas just before the weekend, along with his mother and Eva Longoria, partying in his private suite with a basketball court. As you recall, JT hooked up with Milano shortly after breaking up with Britney - a shortlived romance punctuated by a few “walk of shame” morning photos before he supposedly called it off because of age. Full Story

Friday, January 19, 2007
Dear Gossips, Gwyneth is coming. Gwyneth is coming to Sundance. Honestly, there are parts of the day when I think about this and I can hardly breath. The best part about Sundance so far? Definitely the poseurs – Kfed lookalikes flanked by scantily clad famef*ckettes cruising Main Street looking for celebrities…almost as enjoyable as going to a hockey game and observing the Hockey Whores. Oh…and Robert Redford is a stud. Saw him at the opening press conference yesterday, like all movie stars he was shorter than you’d expect but still kinda hot. In that older dude kinda hot way. And hair the most mesmerising shade of… Yellow. Wrinkled but sexy weathered wrinkles that go well with his deep voice and thoughtful banter and his willingness to say whatever the hell he wants. Many of you have observed that Brad Pitt bears a striking resemblance 20 years younger and if that really is where he’s headed – definitely NOT a bad thing. Star-filled weekend ahead, will keep you posted if I don’t freeze first. As for Isaiah Washington? Maybe I’m just a grudge-keeping petty ass bitch but what’s an apology with a gun to your head? Does “Sorry” really mean “Sorry” when it comes only out of consequence? Nope. Not to me. Can his ass. Hire someone else. Let him watch Burke from the privacy of Unemployment Central as he entertains offers from Patricia Heaton for a talk show about “Family Values”. Friday – blogging throughout the day, check back often for new posts, and have a great weekend! Yours in gossip, Lainey

The Daily Gwyneth Mouth Disease: Gisele Bundchen

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 19, 2007 12:00:00 January 19, 2007 12:00:00

My Gwyneth: condescending, holier-than-thou, stuck up and elitist… I love her for the attitude though at times she really should shut the f&ck up. Same goes for Gisele Bundchen. Especially Gisele Bundchen. A model talking? A model defending her profession? Shut up and look pretty, honey. It’s your body we’re after…not your mouth. Full Story

The Daily Rossum: Rossum turns Ugly…literally

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 19, 2007 12:00:00 January 19, 2007 12:00:00

Even I have to sympathise here. Poor thing showed up an event last night with Swarovski as her sponsor and…well…suffice to say, those nauseating doe eyes can’t do crystal. And the result? ROSSUM of course! Still…good to know some things never change. Same princess gown, same ballerina style, same goody goody body language, same Emmy Rossum just in time to make you vomit. Full Story

Hermy Cam’s brilliant revenge

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 19, 2007 12:00:00 January 19, 2007 12:00:00

I gotta give it to the girl…how to get over a little Pip who wouldn’t give her babies? How to redeem herself after falling apart in public at the Golden Globes? How to right the Geisha Face after her fashion disaster on the carpet? Come back good and hard with a bonafide beach hunk, that’s how. News broke yesterday that Cam was hangin’ with Kelly Slater, now the photos – toned tight body in Hawaii, showing off in a bikini, impressing him with her surf prowess…apparently he couldn’t take his eyes off her. Full Story

Country Sweetheart insecure and jealous?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 19, 2007 12:00:00 January 19, 2007 12:00:00

sh-t…now here’s a shocker. A sweetheart not so much??? Received an email from the lovely AC in Texas: Hi Lainey! Carrie Underwood and Tony Romo were at a very nice restaurant in South Lake, Texas recently. Tony was a charmer and Carrie was a complete and total BITCH! Neither Please nor Thank You ever came out of her mouth! My friend was refilling water when an older lady came by and asked Carrie for an autograph and Carrie barked at her and told her to go away. Full Story

Praise Goddess, Britney single?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 19, 2007 12:00:00 January 19, 2007 12:00:00

X17 F&ck. Almost there. Almost another week without having to write about her. But this is good news… I think. Because Britney apparently told x17 pappies she and new beau Isaac Cohen were “not together”. Which frees her up for Pipsqueak. Full Story

Hollywood Ebola: Wonky Eye is the new Uggs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 19, 2007 12:00:00 January 19, 2007 12:00:00

So over, so 2006, dead, done, passé, gone. According to Page Six, Paris Hilton is getting rid of her Wonky Eye. She apparently tried to get rid of it years ago – a procedure to lift her lids which obviously never worked. These days however, because of her incessant contact-wearing, preferring fake baby blues over the real brown, the overusage is causing one side to droop more than the other, and as such she was spotted with Nicky Hilton at a plastic surgeon’s the other day, intent on correcting the mismatch. Full Story

Scientology and Hairspray

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 19, 2007 12:00:00 January 19, 2007 12:00:00

The Pilot in drag. For a role, of course. Never in real life. Because John Travolta’s only indulgence is a really a great massage, right? And when your muscles are getting kneaded with such pleasure, resulting in so much relaxation, courtesy of a goodlooking masseur, c*ckstands are actually just par for the course. Full Story