Britney...already???

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

To survive in Hollywood these days, you apparently need an open door vagina...as evidenced by the likes of Hollywood Slut Bridage, newest member Britney Spears. Spotted kissing some new dude underneath her new jet locks, just a month after announcing her split from that slime she married. No...the other one. Full Story

The Daily Quiveration: Only Ewan

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

If Gwen Stefani can wear anything and pretty much get away with it, can we say the same for Ewan McGregor? Check him out at the NYC premiere of Miss Potter last night. The hair, the denim he-leggings, the shoes…above all those shoes… But somehow it works, non? Somehow, Ewan’s campy androgyny is sexier than any beefcake meathead. Full Story

Mad About Violet

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

I love her. No. I am crazy about her. And since little Apple Martin isn’t so little, fully entrenched in the bratty 3-6 year range, I couldn’t be happier to have Violet occupy the cutest famous baby spot until the Chosen One is trotted out for public consumption. Speaking of children – both my nephews 8 and 6 and my niece now 4, with their parents and my inlaws, and dogs and my husband, all of us in a 500 square foot cabin for Christmas. Full Story

Nicole Richie: DUI

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

TMZ is breaking the news - Nicole Richie arrested for drunk driving at 4:45am Monday morning and released just minutes ago. Sigh. Like friend, like friend. Paris was booked for the same charge earlier this year, allegedly because she drank on an empty stomach. Doing the same would obviously be magnified in Nicole"s case. Full Story

Renee: Fresh-faced for Miss Potter

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

Her skin - looking remarkably…NEW…is it not? Like a layer freshly surfaced or an old one scrubbed and peeled off, not that that’s a bad thing, not at all actually – I think she looks great – it’s just the sort of thing that jumps out and begs to be noticed, you know? Kinda like Nicole Kidman’s forehead…but I digress. Full Story

TomKat: pre-party soccer

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

Once again, a fixture at the weekend match. Once again, totally inseparable, as though Katie would stop breathing if he stopped touching her. Note the thinner she gets, the plumper he becomes – the GMD’s physique is so totally Travolta these days, non? As you know, their wedding celebration was the same night: 300 guests at Paula Wagner’s including the usual pre-scientologists Jennifer Lopez, the Smiths and of course some industry heavyweights including Bruckheimer and Brian Grazer. Full Story

Brad & Angie: Dinner at DeNiro’s

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

Can you hear the “Brangelina’s” squealing??? They’re holding hands! Here are Brad and Angelina reportedly on their way to dinner at Robert DeNiro’s on Sunday night – thanks Karen! Hate to gush but it’s undeniable, non? Hardcore gorgessity –almost too much to bear. By the way – Barbara Walters’ annual list of Most Intriguing People of the Year comes out tomorrow, the Pitts came in at #2. Full Story

The Daily Low Budget: Courteney Cox

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

I don’t care who made this dress, whatever the label, whatever the hype, at best it’s the office Christmas party, in reality it’s $39.99 at Walmart, Kmart, Fashion Mart…whatever budget mart you can think of that showcases cast-off material from the school dance recital or a figure skating competition, take your pick…to say nothing of the assy footwear. Full Story

Jennifer Aniston: a friendly black dress

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

Even by her standards, this is orange, non? Does she ever NOT tan? Check out Jen supporting Courteney at the premiere of Dirt on Saturday wearing…wait for it, wait for it… yes of course, a little black dress – totally appropriate on this night. Courteney, after all, is her fiercest ally, her shoulder to cry on, again and again and again and again. Full Story

Britney Becoming Cam

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

It’s not that I don’t think she looks good – she does look good. Going dark takes away the redneck chicken fried vibe of her previous weave and it’s never a bad thing to scale back on the trash. Problem is the timing. The timing sucks. Because even though Britney has shown vast improvement, even though the body is on its way back, even though the spotty Cheeto blemishes have largely receded, she still hasn’t totally achieved fighting form. Full Story

Officially Mrs Iglesias?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 11, 2006 12:00:00 December 11, 2006 12:00:00

Late 2004 - the rumours were persistent but never officially confirmed. In fact, the two have remained coy, admitting it at times, denying it at others, with their mouthpiece declining to seal it either way. But after a quiet 2 years of undercover loving, during which Anna has apparently developed an aversion to food, their marriage seems to be a public acknowledgement, with Page Six referring to Anna as Enrique’s wife in a report yesterday about his $1 million fee to appear at some billionaire’s Hanukkah celebration. Full Story