Parent Pimps Articles

Celebrity parents who pimp out their children for fame.

Remember this photo?

June 3, 2009 11:33:05 Posted at June 3, 2009 11:33:05
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I wrote about this the other day. Click here to read more. So there’s the photo… and then there’s the VIDEO. Miley Cyrus’s little sister Noah Lindsey and her friend announcing themselves to the world. Full Story

One of these is a Cyrus

June 1, 2009 12:47:12 Posted at June 1, 2009 12:47:12
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Thanks Kristy for the heads up. One of these objects is a Cyrus. Noah Lindsey Cyrus. 9 years old. 9!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You must CLICK HERE for more of these images. If you can stomach it. Full Story

Porny makes it pay

May 27, 2009 12:25:14 Posted at May 27, 2009 12:25:14
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s the Papa Joe way! Profit from EVERYTHING. And why not? Sounds like Porny Simpson is going back to reality where she saw the most success. On the heels of the amazing photos of her singing at the Chilli Country Cook Off wearing the best pants ever, Us Weekly is reporting  Full Story

Chicken Fried at the wedding

May 25, 2009 06:54:26 Posted at May 25, 2009 06:54:26
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Fresh off her Caribbean getaway, Britney Spears made an appearance this weekend at her cousin’s wedding in Amite, Louisiana. Jamie Lynn was listed as a bridesmaid, Chicken Fried was listed as an “honourary” bridesmaid. By all accounts, Britney looked amazing. In a brown dress to the ankle, v in the front and back, hair was straight, didn’t look budget, good makeup, and very white teeth. Full Story

Ordering is not fighting

May 4, 2009 07:30:48 Posted at May 4, 2009 07:30:48
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Paps claim that these photos taken of JailBait Miley Cyrus and her loser douche 20 year old boyfriend Justin show the two having an argument about their relationship. Depends on how you Photo Assumption. I don’t Photo Assumption a fight. I do however Photo Assumption an order. Or a series of orders. Full Story

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Taylor learns the business

April 29, 2009 10:14:00 Posted at April 29, 2009 10:14:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Saturday Taylor Lautner went to dinner and a movie with Selena Gomez, young love in bloom. Sunday he and his dad hooked up for a friendly lunch with a girl he used to work with back in the Nickelodeon days. Vancouver is a major production hotspot right now! The girl was accompanied by her mother who is also her publicist. Full Story

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How Lilo lost weight: Adderall

April 29, 2009 09:08:22 Posted at April 29, 2009 09:08:22
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Am sure you’ve seen them this week – photos of Lindsay Lohan in Hawaii all bones and skank and laced with cocaine. Shot after shot she’s in her bikini, soaking up the attention, eating up the attention, a substitute for food, knowing that she’s scraped up another reason for people to care about her. Full Story

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JailBait tests your self control

April 27, 2009 06:39:49 Posted at April 27, 2009 06:39:49
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Only Emmy Rossum makes me feel this violent. It’s wrong – of course it is. I KNOW. But I challenge you. I challenge you to watch JailBait Miley Cyrus on Jonathan Ross last Friday, in London to promote Hannah Montana, and come out the other side without wanting to slap her beat-me mouth. Full Story

3 Dirty Faces

April 16, 2009 11:53:35 Posted at April 16, 2009 11:53:35
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Holy. F-ck. What did old hag Ali Lohan do to her face? Or… what did her mother let her do to her face? That is not a 15 year old face! And it’s not the face she was born with either! You all seem to be surgery and injection experts – you tell me: what is going on here? And why do all three of them look like they smeared themselves in decade-old foundation? Here they are, the ladies of Lohan, last night at an A/X watch launch event trying to stay relevant. Full Story

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Mouse Boys

April 15, 2009 08:52:19 Posted at April 15, 2009 08:52:19
Lainey Posted by Lainey

17 Again, the LA premiere last night. As you’d expect, there was a strong Disney contingent present to support Zac Efron. The Mouse’s current favourite son was joined by the Mouse’s current favourite family – LipGloss and the Vagina Virgins together for one screamworthy evening! Lip, as you can see, is once again working those inturned feet. Full Story

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Two options

April 8, 2009 15:58:15 Posted at April 8, 2009 15:58:15
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Billy Ray parent pimp has accompanied his second life meal ticket and daughter Miley to New York to promote the Hannah Montana movie. They performed on Good Morning America today. Yesterday they made the rounds at other talk shows. Here he is, hair freshly ironed and that f-cking soul patch sprayed and gelled, stopping to sign autographs. Full Story