Festival Ebola

September 9, 2008 09:32:00 Posted at September 9, 2008 09:32:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

There’s a stank around Toronto this morning and it has everything to do with the fact that Hollywood Ebola Paris Hilton has arrived. She’s screening a movie tonight called Paris Not France and came in with Benji Madden yesterday to host a party at Ultra.

Here they are at the airport – my sources say they were met there by 5 bodyguards who were ready to escort her out a side entrance to avoid the paps. Instead, as you would expect, Ebola insisted on heading out the front. This despite recent comments that she wants privacy from photographers. Please. Privacy is never a consideration.

Who the f7ck believes this twat?

So anyway, she rolls up to Ultra just after midnight and immediately proceeds to get trashed up her black hole vagina. You will recall, last time she was in town, she puked all over the staff bathroom at another venue and left a mess for employees to clean up.

A friend was there last night and he texted me at 1:30am begging me for an escape route. She was apparently flailing up on the DJ booth, wobbling around from side to side, flinging her disease up in the air and contaminating the entire room.

Word is Ebola was also supposed to spread her virus up at the Hyatt at some point, but was too drunk to make it. This is a relief. Because Colin Firth was there. And I don’t know if I love him enough to have offered to sacrifice myself to save Mark Darcy. Happily the crisis was averted.

Update: Have just heard from the folks at Ultra about last night's Ebola party. Their official statement is below.

We can 100% assure you that Paris was not drunk during her appearance at all and was in fact dancing behind the booth and signing autographs for her fans, while promoting the launch of Rich Prosecco in Canada.

Photo by Punkd Images

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