Photo Assumption Articles

The Video Assumption Foreshadowing

January 3, 2012 16:21:23 Posted at January 3, 2012 16:21:23
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Colin MacFarlane/Splash

You knew while watching the MTV VMAs, right? That it was only a matter of time. Click here for a refresher. This is what I wrote then, based only on Video Assuming his face throughout the show, as he paid tribute to fellow addict Amy Winehouse while his wife took every opportunity on camera to boast about all her tequila shots:“There were times he looked almost pained. Full Story

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Scarjo feeling Scroogey?

December 12, 2011 15:50:17 Posted at December 12, 2011 15:50:17
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Flynet

Scarlett Johansson had a crusty face on in New York last night, presumably in town to begin a round of publicity for the upcoming We Bought a Zoo opening on December 23. Scarjo is never great with paps, unless of course she’s going out of her way to be great with paps when she knows she has to sell it (funny how that is, non?), but right now I wonder if it’s more than just the paps; right now I Photo Assume that it’s also a lot of Blake Lively. Full Story

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Photo Assumption: What Karl’s doll thinks of Shelfy

December 5, 2011 17:54:51 Posted at December 5, 2011 17:54:51
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

Also on Wetten Dass in Germany the other day, the most random collection of guests...And for part of the program, Jessica Biel was seated next to Karl Lagerfeld. Needless to say, there’s some selective photo editing happening here on my part but, you know, on the one hand you have a collection of guests were are charismatic and entertaining and then there’s Shelfy, who’s less interesting than Karl’s doll and who’s never provided a witty or clever sound-bite in her life. Full Story

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Photo Assumption: What Lenny thinks of Shelfy

December 5, 2011 17:35:24 Posted at December 5, 2011 17:35:24
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

On Wetten Dass in Germany the other day...Lenny Kravitz looks thoroughly depressed that a girl as gorgeous as Jessica Biel can be so f-cking boring. You see how he seems much more engaged when talking to everyone, ANYONE, else? There are a couple of shots involving Shelfy that totally crack me up. More on the way, and then a post about the food thing. Full Story

Posh & Moss

November 29, 2011 16:28:33 Posted at November 29, 2011 16:28:33
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
Wenn, Dave M. Benett/Getty

Victoria Beckham won the Best Designer Brand last night at the British Fashion Awards in London. More validation, I guess, that she’s really a legitimate fashion person now. She was quite emotional about the honour and graciously thanked her team and her family and hard-posed as she does, as you know, and as I was sorting through the photos of her at the event, I saw a few of her with Kate Moss and Marc Jacobs and I thought to myself. Full Story

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He lights up her life

October 4, 2011 15:33:19 Posted at October 4, 2011 15:33:19
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Photos:
WENN

I could totally picture her singing that to him...Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick attended The Friends In Deed benefit in New York last night at the American Museum of Natural History. As you can see, Matthew seemed unusually happy; his smile actually looks almost un-forced, and, as such, she is beaming beside him. Full Story

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Prison Bride dragged out for duty

August 30, 2011 06:52:39 Posted at August 30, 2011 06:52:39
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Look at him in the first photo attached, glancing back at his wife, the Serene Highness of Captivity Princess Charlene, as if he can barely stand her, and can’t be bothered to conceal it. Dick. The Monte Carlo Golf Club was celebrating its 100th anniversary on Sunday. So Prince Albert of Monaco had to show up for the occasion, dragging his nauseous bride along for the photo opportunity, the best illustration of “a smile that doesn’t reach the eyes” that I’ve ever seen. Full Story

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Video Assumption: Katy Perry & Russell Brand

August 29, 2011 07:58:57 Posted at August 29, 2011 07:58:57
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I love them together. A lot. I imagine that it must be just pure jokes and laughs when they’re in bed. This makes me happy. Which is why I’m so worried. Maybe it’s because she was so annoying last night, with her weird British accent and a reference to tequila every time she had the mic. Full Story

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Please say hi to me

August 10, 2011 09:33:54 Posted at August 10, 2011 09:33:54
Lainey Posted by Lainey

These pictures made me laugh. Shia Labeouf and Joe Jonas walked past each other at Cafe Med yesterday in West Hollywood. Let’s Photo Assumption the Middle Vagina Virgin’s face: Please know me. Please say hi to me. Please look up. Please let’s bro-shake. Should I walk back in the other direction? How can I run around the back and come across him all over again without seeming obvious? Should I try it? Please let me be his friend. Full Story

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They gave up a bad shot

August 1, 2011 07:31:38 Posted at August 1, 2011 07:31:38
Lainey Posted by Lainey

You know they’re probably the best at this, so I was surprised to find a picture that could be easily manipulated for negative photo assumption. And the next time Life & Style wants to say that Brad Hates Angie!, this is the shot they’ll be using. The Brange attended the Sarajevo Film Festival this weekend where Angelina presented an award and received one herself – the Honorary Heart of Sarajevo Award for her contribution to the arts and also for her "active engagement in the complexities of the real world”. Full Story

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Video Assumption: JLo & Marc

July 21, 2011 07:32:54 Posted at July 21, 2011 07:32:54
Lainey Posted by Lainey

How late do you think Ben Affleck stayed up last night pleading with his wife Jennifer Garner to let him back in the house? It was reported yesterday, in case you missed it, which I’m sorry if you did because it was the best story ever, that JLo’s ma Guadalupe, emailed Ben for relationship advice for her daughter. Full Story

Wednesday’s cover

July 18, 2011 13:59:00 Posted at July 18, 2011 13:59:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Most tabloids close tonight. Just in time then for Star/Life&Style/InTouch/etc to throw these shots on the cover – Brad caught cheating! Brad Pitt is in Rome or England (the photo agency can’t make up its mind about the location but does claim to be able to read Brad’s behaviour) continuing to shoot World War Z after spending a few weeks in production in Malta in which he appeared to only wear one outfit. Full Story

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Photo Assumption: Matthew Broderick & SJP at HP7B

July 12, 2011 11:54:49 Posted at July 12, 2011 11:54:49
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Check out his face in the first photo. Says it all, non? I observed them last night on the carpet and it wasn’t like he was any different from the images we usually see of the two of them together. He seemed over it. He seemed ... not so enthusiastic. In sharp contrast to his wife Sarah Jessica Parker who was very animated, very excited, all smiles. Full Story

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Photo Assumption: Mrs Affleck at the BAFTA Gala

July 11, 2011 10:02:44 Posted at July 11, 2011 10:02:44
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s just one photo, one face, but I like it for the purpose of this story. Jennifer Garner at the BAFTA Gala to meet Will & Kate and, well, Jennifer Lopez AND Blake Lively were also there. That’s an easy Photo Assumption, non? Interestingly enough, you’ll note that both Garner and Lopez bumrushed it over to say hello to Princess Catherine and have their photos taken but Blake Lively. Full Story

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