Stay Down

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 27, 2009 08:50:07 November 27, 2009 08:50:07

I’m tired of telling her to sit DOWN. Every time she opens her mouth she’s asking for a sit DOWN. At this point it’s become STAY DOWN. And since she’s starved her Shelf Ass away, maybe that should be her new name.

STAY DOWN Jessica Biel.

It’s a new interview with The Independent to promote Planet 51 and even though the journalist cheekily acknowledges that Jessica’s claim to fame rests solely on her physique and her famous boyfriend, somehow she still manages to work “Oscar” into the conversation talking like she’s now Kate Winslet.

Jessica Biel and Kate Winslet?


This is Biel’s answer when asked about what motivates her as an actress:

"The truth is, you really don't make these movies thinking, 'Oh, this one's it. This is going to get me my Academy Award.' You don't think about that. You think, 'I love this story, I love this character. I can't wait to play this character.' And then it comes out and people start talking about it, and it's exciting. Privately you give this speech and everything, but you really think, 'Whatever. If I win, amazing.' I mean, I can't even believe if that would happen. That would be incredible. But is that the goal for my work? 'I must win an award'? No. You do think about it, but you don't dwell on it, because it just sort of feels so untouchable and so unrealistic. You just feel like there's no way you'd win, so whatever, you just laugh about it and have a good time. But I think I'd be lying to say that you don't fantasise about it.”


What on Jessica Biel’s resume would ever warrant any discussion about an Academy Award?

I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry, Valentine’s Day, A-Team, Easy Virtue (dvd the next day), Powder Blue (straight to dvd)…

When would she ever have been in a position to have “people start talking about it”, when would she have ever been prompted to think that “whatever, if I win, amazing”???

It’s the equivalent of me shooting a minute long segment on etalk about “Hollywood Homewreckers” and then modestly hinting to my friends over dinner that night that – oh there’s NO way my piece would be considered for Peabody Award. I’m just happy to have the work.
Absurd, right?


STAY DOWN and shut the f-ck up.

Photos from

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