Sasha Answers: Discuss your pregnant options

October 16, 2012 18:45:47 Posted at October 16, 2012 18:45:47
Sasha Posted by Sasha

Hi Sasha, So, I've been seeing this amazing guy for three months now, and things between us have been ideal to say the least. It's very serious; we acknowledge that we want to be together for a long time. Some background on us, I'm 25, he's 28, we both have fantastic jobs and love our lives. While we are very aware that we both think we've found the 'one', we're not in a hurry. The issue? I just found out I was pregnant. I know the decision on whether or not to keep it is mine, and I would never think to ask you to make up my mind for me when it comes to something like this.  I'm writing because I never hear anyone I actually know talking about abortion? Is it a lot more common than I realize?  What are their feelings typically after? Thanks-  A

The simple answer here is YES – abortion is common (around 100,000 abortions take place in Canada each year, but keep in mind this number only reflects the procedures that have been reported).  Now what’s complicated though is the way our society approaches it; whether it’s the angry rhetoric from political parties or  religious pro-lifers, abortion is, well, not exactly water cooler talk.

Full disclosure A, I’ve never had an abortion, so I can't personally tell you what it’s like.  I do have friends though who have been open enough to share their experiences, and there's been a whole range of different sentiments.  Some walked in and out of the procedure as if they were getting a mole removed, and then there were others that came out of it emotionally and physically scarred.  While each person coped in their own way, I can say that, from my small sample of friends at least, there were no regrets. 

Now A, I don’t know if what I’ve told you makes your decision any clearer, but what I do know is that you need to really think about what you can handle in your life mentally, emotionally and financially. 

So if I had one suggestion for you, it would be to talk to someone other than me.  Whether it’s a trusted family member or a best friend, I do think you need to discuss your options so that you can make the right decision for YOU. And of course, it goes without saying that you need to talk to your boyfriend and let him know what’s going on.  While I don’t think he should be your deciding factor either way, he should be part of the conversation. 

Keep me posted! xx

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