Sasha Answers: Friends & Jobs
Dear Sasha, Long story short, about 10 years ago I was approached to help start up a little production company, it was a great opportunity and I jumped at it. I was able to help employ a lot of fellow freelancers and found the challenge of the job immensely rewarding. In our second year my boss decided to employ an office production coordinator, my first thought was my neighbor, who I was getting to know, would be perfect for the job. She had zero production experience but enough office experience and really hit it off with my boss so was hired. Cut to 9 years later and she is running the show, she is fantastic at her job and I'm really proud of her! We have become good friends and although we've had our ups and downs, which is completely normal in our line of work, we have always resolved any issues.
This year I gave up my role as a production manager to focus on my newborn, however, I mentioned to my friend that I was really keen to take on some part time work in the office in a few months as we always employ someone during the peak season and her reply was that due to a previous bad experience she had decided not to hire friends to work with as it could destroy the friendship.
I totally get her thinking but feel as we have already worked together under different circumstances that this "rule" shouldn't apply to me. This company has been my sole employment for nearly 10 years; I love this company and have no idea what else I would do! I feel like in trying to protect our friendship she could potentially damage it as quite frankly my new little family could really do with the cash and her cockblocking is building up some resentment! I would really appreciate some outside perspective!
Here’s my perspective: she’s being a straight up beeatch. I know the production world is competitive, but god, it’s not like you’re gunning for her job; you just want your old one back!!!
Wow, I know you know this, but I’m having a really hard time trying to understand where she’s coming from.
Okay so here’s what I think you should do: Set up a lunch date and really put it all out there. I want you to hit every point you just did in your letter to me – everything from giving her a chance at the start of her career, to being an unsupportive friend. Hopefully after this one-on-one ‘meeting’ she’ll realize what a power tripping asshole she’s been. If she doesn’t get this, then I say F-CK HER!
Look I can’t have you begging this chick for a job and J, if I could cast a positive light here, this is the perfect sign for you to move on and find a new gig. I know this job has been your home and comfort zone for a decade, but I’m telling you, this might just be the extra push you need to try something new. I have no doubt you’ll land on your two feet again. It’s always good to mix things up every now and then, and hey, looks like you might have no choice. But f-ck it, it’s 2012 – here’s to new beginnings, new pursuits, oh and while you’re at it, a new effing friend!