Sasha Answers: My Online Crush
Hello Sasha, I've gotten myself into a bit of a weird situation. Don't judge, but a while ago out of pure boredom I found myself on a website where you randomly chat with strangers (not over webcam, ew). Anyway, usually I just go on to talk to someone I would have otherwise would never have talked to and it ends there. I ended up talking to one guy, however, and we had a great surprisingly long conversation. So for the past month or so we've been exchanging very long messages basically everyday. It's been really platonic, he hasn't even asked to add me on facebook or skype and I don't even know how he looks or if he has a weird voice. I'm a pretty realistic person and I know that even feeling an inkling of romantic feelings towards him would make no sense. We're both broke ass students and live on the opposite sides of the world, so we'll likely never meet. We have the right amount of common interests and he is not at all pervy, weird or desperate when we chat. I don't want to limit myself romantically because I keep comparing guys to someone I have never met and probably never will meet. Can you help a girl out?
Being a realist is a great trait to have, but sometimes, especially when it comes to matters of the heart, it can be a big ass cock block. And L, it seems like there’s some self-sabotaging going on here.
As much as you want to plan or strategize your life, when it comes having feelings for someone, well, that’s a whole other f-cking thing. A lot of the time it comes down to luck, chance, timing – all things we have no control over and while that’s scary as all f-ck, it’s really what makes liking someone so painfully fun.
I’m not saying that you two are meant to be; sh-t, I’m not even saying that you’ll ever even meet the guy, but right now you're trying to talk yourself out of something you’re getting great satisfaction from. Do you see how that makes zero sense on your part?
Look, you’re obviously interested in the guy, so if I were you I’d crank it up a notch. So that means you need to figure out if there’s a spark beyond these typed words on your computer screen. Yes L, you need to find out what the dude looks and sounds like.
Now don’t spaz out - it's easy. For starters get on another medium like email or Facebook so that you can check out if the dude has Steve Buscemi face or not. If you like what you see then take it up another level by chatting face to face on something like Skype.
The fact of the matter is you went online looking for something, and damn, you actually found someone that isn’t seemingly a total pedo freak! So L, why don’t you take a step to the left and get out of your own way.
Hope this helps and thanks for writing in! Keep your Life + Style questions coming! Xx