She totally hates them

September 22, 2009 09:16:09 Posted at September 22, 2009 09:16:09
Lainey Posted by Lainey

JailBait Miley Cyrus was photographed by the paps after lunch with her friend yesterday. Doesn’t she look like she hates the paps so much? They are vile, reprehensible creatures!

This, you see, is the message she tried to convey on her Twitter yesterday:

Being a paparatzi is the most DISGUISTING job imaginable. Being followed around by creepy photographers is NOT in the job description! YOU try being stuck inside cuz creepers are waiting for u.

Then she tweeted back at Perez Hilton, yes, the gossip blogger, to justify why she smiles when she’s shot after he called her out for actually being rather well acquainted with a few paps when it suits her purposes:

@perezhilton 1. theres nothing i can do about it so i might as well smile and 2. allison lets me make my own shake at millions of milkshakes


Oh yeah, she’s a pro. Celebrities have an excuse for everything. This one’s been learning how NOT to take ownership since she took her first breath.

Unfortunately she’s not learning how to read and write. Because this is what she tweeted last night:

Doing homework. Learning about justice. Shoot. Maybe I will be a lawer.


F-ck me I was too lazy to screen cap it last night but by this morning she’d deleted it. Thankfully, hundreds of people on Twitter decided to retweet it, commemorating her career aspiration – a LAWER.

You think this is a typo?

This is the same girl who writes “should of” instead of “should have”. Click here for a refresher.

What’s most alarming is that she actually believes, like so many in this generation of entitled twats, that she could very well be a LAWER.

Because these days we teach our children that if you try hard and you BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, you can do ANYTHING. Like become a movie star, or an astronaut, or American Idol.

Most kids now would rather be American Idol.

And the parents they say – yes, yes, you can do it! you can’t sing but you can do it!

When I was 5 I wanted to be a cartoon character. At 6 it was a kung fu master. At 7 Miss Hong Kong. My mother told me: Don’t disgrace me! Study hard. Be a doctor! Mommy always sick! If you looked like me your mommy only, you could be Miss Hong Kong EASY. But you look half like your daddy’s family. So the only thing you can be is Miss EASY Hong Hong.

This is love. She didn’t want me to spend my life on my back with my legs spread, literally and figuratively, chasing a pipe dream.

Miley Cyrus won’t be a LAWER. Her parents have never wanted that for her anyway.


Photos from Ahmad Elatab/Splashnewsonline.com

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