Smutty Surgery Articles

Celebrity plastic surgery, liposuction, and other cosmetic procedures.

Granny’s Third Lip loves tennis

September 8, 2009 07:10:04 Posted at September 8, 2009 07:10:04
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Watching the US Open? I’ll say it off the top, we can argue about it later: I am on Team Rafa. Federer is amazing, obviously, but we like who we like. And I like Nadal much more. Also, the monogrammed everything is so lame. Second to Rafa, definitely Djokovic, and after that anyone but Andy Roddick. Full Story

View All 10 Photos

Lilo: new lips, new face?

August 20, 2009 11:56:22 Posted at August 20, 2009 11:56:22
Lainey Posted by Lainey

She’s cranked up all over New York this week, surrounded by sycophants, spending her days shopping, her nights trying to be seen. You’ll note – she was not at The September Issue premiere last night. Please. Like Anna Wintour would have allowed it. Instead, Lindsay Lohan decided to show off her new lips. Full Story

View All 8 Photos

51 year old ass

August 17, 2009 11:19:06 Posted at August 17, 2009 11:19:06
Lainey Posted by Lainey

This is what it looks like. Madonna turned 51 yesterday, celebrated at a dinner party in Portofino seated beside her petting toy Jesus Luz. In the soft candlelight, and having chilled out a little on the face work, Madge easily, from this blurry pap distance, looks 10 years younger. Does Jesus ever smile? For some reason this sentence made me laugh. Full Story

View All 14 Photos

Dumbasses write books and make movies

July 29, 2009 09:18:42 Posted at July 29, 2009 09:18:42
Lainey Posted by Lainey

This is an I Hate People article. It will make you angry and punchy. You have been warned. Lisa Rinna “wrote” a book. It’s called Rinnavation: Getting Your Best Life Ever. Really? Her????? Yes. Her. Lisa Rinna can help you improve your life. Please. She was at a signing yesterday and showed off all six of her lips. Full Story

View All 12 Photos

White Party sh-t list

July 6, 2009 07:31:03 Posted at July 6, 2009 07:31:03
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Once upon a time, when Diddy was still important, his white parties were legendary. An invitation was hard to come by. These days? At a Diddy White Party? Not so exclusive. This weekend, with one or two exceptions, his guest list consisted of mostly has-beens and reality stars. Like Tara Reid. And Tila Tequila. Full Story

View All 12 Photos

Are you borrowing from your wife?

May 21, 2009 11:01:42 Posted at May 21, 2009 11:01:42
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Last night at the American Idol final – Keith Urban performed. I’m here in Cannes, didn’t watch, but going from these photos… is there something new about his face? Did Granny Freeze buy him some fillers? Look at that. That is fresh and new and definitely de-lined, non? Or maybe it’s that he’s too orange. Full Story

Granny drinks ginger ale!

May 6, 2009 08:45:57 Posted at May 6, 2009 08:45:57
Lainey Posted by Lainey

They hawk everything overseas. Watches, cologne, cars, banks, video games…everything. For some reason in North America though we find endorsements unsavoury, which is why so many of them keep their money grabs on the quiet side. Thanks to the power of the internets though this has become increasingly difficult. Full Story

Freshly needled?

May 1, 2009 08:55:00 Posted at May 1, 2009 08:55:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Still think her face is the best, that her surgeon’s work is the best… But maybe not, like, the day of. Or even the day after. This is Demi at the Cartier event last night. I will say it for you since you’re thinking it but afraid to vocalise it because you don’t want to go hell. Full Story

View All 13 Photos

Diamonds for the best work

April 30, 2009 16:32:31 Posted at April 30, 2009 16:32:31
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Cartier is celebrating 100 years in America. To commemorate the occasion, they’ve announced a philanthropic partnership with ServiceNation and recruited Demi Moore to be on hand at the press conference today. Totally makes sense. Cartier produces diamonds. Diamonds are a girl’s best friend. Full Story

This is Meg Ryan

April 27, 2009 10:12:13 Posted at April 27, 2009 10:12:13
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I thought I should tell you because you might not recognise her. It’s understandable. After all, it’s not like there’s anything natural, or original, about her face anymore. This is Meg Ryan. At the premiere of Serious Moonlight at the Tribeca Film Festival on Friday, her lips expanding to attack her cheeks, her cheeks swollen and taking over her eyes, she looks like Rupert Everett. Full Story

Is he a client too?

April 20, 2009 06:36:32 Posted at April 20, 2009 06:36:32
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Of the aforementioned Dr Brandt? Haven’t seen George Clooney in a while. He was in NYC on Saturday night with a rather fresh looking face… Or maybe he’s just drunk. Full Story