Smutty Surgery Articles

Celebrity plastic surgery, liposuction, and other cosmetic procedures.

Mousey Granny!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 1, 2012 16:51:35 May 1, 2012 16:51:35
Photos:
SWNS/Splash

Here are Nicole Kidman and Colin Firth shooting The Railway Man in Perth. I quite like her with brown hair. It softens all that sh-t she’s done to her face even though, from this distance, and in a blurry shot, that third upper lip is as bloated as ever. I really wish she’d stop muting her talent with her obsession to stay unwrinkled. Full Story

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I can’t find your point because you are too smart

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 9, 2012 19:49:52 April 9, 2012 19:49:52
Photos:
WENN

A few years ago, there was an article floating around about Ashley Judd being the most “erudite” celebrity on the list of Erudite Celebrities. Is it because she’s so well educated? Perhaps. But I wonder if it isn’t because she wrestles you down on the ground with her big words and mashes them in your face until you concede. Full Story

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Granny Freeze Grace

Sarah Posted by Sarah at April 9, 2012 14:16:53 April 9, 2012 14:16:53

I had such a huge lady crush on Nicole Kidman ten years ago, circa Moulin Rouge. Unlike my lady crush on Lucy Liu, though, the crush on Kidman did not survive the ensuing years and her increasingly frozen face. She made me too sad to crush on her. But maybe Pre-Frozen Nicole is making a comeback. As Entertainment Weekly noted Full Story

Madge’s LA Face & Ass

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 26, 2012 16:20:06 March 26, 2012 16:20:06
Photos:
Tim Mosenfelder/Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty

Madonna appeared on stage at the Ultra Music Festival in Miami, because she’s all the club tracks, this weekend with Avicci who worked on MDNA which drops tomorrow. I haven’t heard the entire album. But I think I’ll like it OK. As in a few catchy beats, something to throw on at the gym, but perhaps not super memorable. Full Story

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Susan Sarandon had lipo

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 22, 2012 15:40:59 March 22, 2012 15:40:59
Photos:
WENN

There’s a feature on Susan Sarandon in the new issue of PEOPLE. She talks about aging in Hollywood. You can read most of it here. I like the part where she talks about how there are a lot of guys out there who are attracted to interesting women. Because their mothers raised them to be. Full Story

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Beach, bikini, breasts, no bump

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2012 20:29:50 March 19, 2012 20:29:50
Photos:
Fame/Flynet, Darren Banks/Splash

8 months after the birth of Bingham, Kate Hudson is on the beach in Mexico looking like she never had a baby, or two. That is a cuuuute bikini, non? And her breast enhancement was really rather modest. Like, barely noticeable, and only, only, only to piece of sh-t gossip whores who study these things for a living, and even then only when you have the before pictures shoved right up in your face. Full Story

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Does red improve her face?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 9, 2012 17:19:04 March 9, 2012 17:19:04
Photos:
Fern/Splash

Lindsay Lohan is back to red hair. It’s better, for sure, for her face. It almost mutes the sh-t that she did to it while the blonde was almost like a magnifying glass, highlighting the extremes: the lips, the cheeks. But is it enough?Is it enough to not be distracting?Is it enough to put her in a position of consideration for roles that are not “drug-addicted sister” or “hooker with a secret”? Is it enough to put her in the same conversation as Anne Hathaway or Jennifer Lawrence?To me? No. Full Story

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Everything in Lohan perspective

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 6, 2012 21:19:40 March 6, 2012 21:19:40
Photos:
Asadorian-Mejia/Splash, Lisa Maree Williams/Getty

Earlier today, Michael K at Dlisted posted these photos of Debbie Harry and Lindsay Lohan. Harry was horrifyingly mistaken for Lohan. Debbie Harry, by the way, is 66. Lindsay Lohan is 25. And then there’s Tara Reid...There was a time when it couldn’t get worse than Tara Reid. Full Story

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Lindsay Lohan’s meaningless SNL

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 5, 2012 15:43:25 March 5, 2012 15:43:25
Photos:
WENN

I was at a junket on Saturday waiting with other reporters when the subject of Lindsay Lohan came up. Almost everyone agreed that she would be solid that night on SNL. And then we disagreed on whether or not it would mean anything, lead to a career comeback. There were 6 of us. Curiously, both Canadians were of the opinion that even if Lohan was awesome, it still wouldn’t make a difference because her face is now too far gone to recover, to put her in contention for any significant roles beyond “prostitute junkie sister who helps main character escape”. Full Story

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Oscar Party Awkwards: Cruise + Beckham

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 27, 2012 20:50:59 February 27, 2012 20:50:59
Photos:
Pascal Le Segretain/Kevin Winter/ROBYN BECK/Getty

Tom Cruise did not walk the carpet with Katie Holmes. Instead, he went straight inside and presented the final award of the night, a responsibility usually reserved for a big deal name. Thank you Mission: Impossible Ghost Protocol. Tom Cruise keeps hanging in there. You do have to admire his tenacity, don’t you? He will never let you push him out. Full Story

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