Tara Reid: Un-Fixable Ghetto

December 28, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at December 28, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
As much as we try to observe those Buddha on the Mountain, Lotus-leaf-and-meditation Oprah moments, I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that while it’s NEVER OK to die for it or suffer or hurt yourself or to be insensible, some if not most of us would like to be thin, to have a nice body. Hell, when you think about it, Oprah is the frickin’ poster girl for wanting a body that has eluded her for years and if you ask me, all that bullsh-t about loving yourself as the first step to losing weight is really just a smokescreen for pure plain Vanity – and hey, ain’t nothing wrong with being Vain, so long as you own it, you know? Better that than hiding it behind a yoga pose waxing wise about Inner Beauty. But I digress. On the subject of being thin – thin might be a preference but it doesn’t mean that thin in all its forms is always a good thing. Case in point: Tara Reid. Went from talk show to talk show, to whoever would listen, moaning about her ghetto tits, moaning about the ghetto surgery, promising a makeover, and a makeover she delivered. No longer bloated, svelte again, kinda pretty in the face again, THIN to be sure…but you couldn’t pay me enough in nights with David Beckham to want this body. No.F&cking.Way. It might look good from the front but the sh-t deteriorates FAST from every other angle. How old is she? Like… 31? If that? What kind of debauchery produces this level of damage? And seriously y’all, girl drives a Porsche. You telling me she was too broke ass to afford something more than a surgeon who turns liposuction into cellulite overproduction? And given that she’s currently on vacay in St Barts, you telling me she can’t scrape up a few thousand dollars to fix this sh-t? Can you imagine? Can you imagine being so busted no amount of work can undo the ghetto? Kinda makes you happy about your own jiggle, non? Source
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