Thinnification Articles

Celebrity weight loss, typically but not exclusively for the purpose of career advancement and not always due to health reasons.

Jacek, she’s too skinny

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 12, 2010 08:22:00 January 12, 2010 08:22:00

Mila Kunis is one of my husband Jacek’s favourite girls. After Marion Cotillard and Penelope Cruz, Mila ranks along with Portman and McAdams and sometimes Shaki. But Mila last night turned up at the LA premiere of The Book of Eli looking much much smaller. Like scary smaller. Not that she wasn’t small to begin with, of course she was, but now it’s Ellen Pompeo styles. Full Story

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Taupe’s little arms

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 4, 2009 11:52:38 December 4, 2009 11:52:38

I remarked on what I perceived to be her Thinnification the other day – click here if you missed it – and last night Taupe Jennifer Garner stepped out at the Children’s Defence Fund in LA showing off her little arms. Or maybe it’s just me. Full Story

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The Thinnification of Taupe

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 30, 2009 15:11:15 November 30, 2009 15:11:15

Jennifer Garner seemed to be in no rush to starve herself following the birth of 2nd daughter Seraphina born last January. Was great. Lately though… This is Garner after getting her hair done yesterday. She looks gaunt, her jeans are falling off of her, her hips, they’re scaring me, and her head suddenly looks really, really big. Full Story

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Porny thinnifies again

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 20, 2009 16:02:32 November 20, 2009 16:02:32

Jessica Simpson has been working hard at the gym. She’s been tweeting about it too. They say she’s taken off 15 pounds with her trainer, will likely be Daisy Duke shaped again by the time she promotes her beauty reality show. Alanis would say: Don’t you think? Anyway, here’s Porny at Ken Paves' salon today after a touchup wearing those dumbass jeans. Full Story

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Skinny Shelfy says she’s studying

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 19, 2009 09:08:38 October 19, 2009 09:08:38

Of course she was. Her publicist always comes up with an excuse. So Pipsqueak Justin Timberlake was in Vegas all last week for his golf tournament which culminated yesterday. Saturday night, as previously mentioned, he and his friends performed at Mandalay Bay to raise money for Shriners Hospitals for Children. Full Story

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Shelf Ass in Vancouver

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 24, 2009 09:36:03 September 24, 2009 09:36:03

She’s here. Arrived yesterday to start work on A-Team in which she plays the secondary token babe in a male-dominated action movie. It’s because she’s so beautiful. Remember, her beauty is an impediment to the evolution of her talent. This is why she’s not being offered the kind of roles that ugly ass Natalie Portman receives. Full Story

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Re-thinnification of Ashlee Simpson

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 4, 2009 10:46:00 September 4, 2009 10:46:00

She’s promoting Melrose Place. Is in New York making the talk show rounds. Photos are attached. Ashlee, as you know, had a baby last year with Pete Wentz. Since landing her new acting gig, she’s been dropping weight steadily. You’ll recall, she did so before allegedly under doctor supervision. Full Story

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Porny’s skinny jeans

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 5, 2009 07:13:27 June 5, 2009 07:13:27

It’s like that episode of Sex & the City – Miranda rediscovers her skinny jeans. Most women are familiar: we have fat jeans and we have skinny jeans. Fat jeans for when we suck. Skinny jeans for when we don’t suck as much. Jessica Simpson, since that amazing performance at the country chilli cookoff a few months ago, has been keeping a relatively low profile, especially the last few weeks. Full Story

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Thinnification of Russell Crowe

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 30, 2009 12:29:20 March 30, 2009 12:29:20

He’s scheduled to start shooting that Robin Hood movie soon – still no confirmation as to his role. This is Russell Crowe sneaking out of the Empire Awards last night in London looking much leaner than he has in… well… years. Be honest. He’s been portly for a while. It’s amazing how they can drop weight so quickly when it’s time to get to work. Full Story

The Thinnification of Scarlett Johansson

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 26, 2009 07:04:55 March 26, 2009 07:04:55

Et tu Scarje? Scarlett Johansson was in London the other night at a Moet & Chandon event. She’s their new spokesperson. As you can see, she’s still on with the dark hair and the red lips but now apparently there is a weight loss objective. Scarjo turned heads with her new “very slim” frame, and was overheard talking to Thandie Newton about a “rigid diet”. Full Story

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Oscar Thinnification: Victoria Beckham

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 23, 2009 10:41:08 February 23, 2009 10:41:08

Posh! We get it! We’ll never ever question whether or not some yo yo crack whore dieter like Lindsay Lohan is thinner than you…never again. You keep it consistent. You maintain the Skinny. You relentlessly pursue the brink point of emaciation vs survival. You are the Boniest Queen of Them All. Full Story

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