Tom & Katie: crazy continued
March 22, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at March 22, 2006 12:00:00
And the press tour begins. Tom Cruise made a very public appearance yesterday at Yahoo alongside his extremely pregnant wife. So please, let’s put our break up hopes aside for the time being. As much as we’d all like to believe she’ll snap out of it one day and save her vulnerable soul, it ain’t happening any time soon, no matter how often Life & Style keeps writing about it. Take a look TomTom baring his teeth on stage, Dr. Evil style. Weird, isn’t? For someone who abhors the non-c*ck variety of blow, he sure looks like he rams a sh*tload of it up his nose. Then there’s the predictably comatose Katie, feigning focus and admiration as he speaks, sheepishly smiling and turning her head away (like she did on Oprah) when he dragged her up on stage. The tragic thing is – Katie actually looks lovely. Her skin is luminous, I love the layers in her hair, and she is adorably bursting at the seams. Who knew alien invasion could produce such fetching results? On, and on a final note – this just in. I have heard from inside sources that the GMD is STRESSED out! Given the notorious year that was, he knows his career is on the line. And MI:3’s box office performance will have everything to do with how his Hollywood status will play out. Apparently studio bosses have made no secret of the fact that his popularity is on the downslope and since they’ve invested a gazillion dollars behind the picture – in addition to back end receipts for GayGay – it’s been made very clear who they will hold accountable if the film underachieves in domestic sales. You know what that means, right? It’s the same thing I told you for War of the Worlds. If you want this crackjob to fly away in his space ship and leave us the f&ck alone, save your money for something else. Like a donation to Covenant House Vancouver Or even a brand new Stella McCartney. I’m partial to the shade metallic bucket bag. So obnoxious and yet soooo calling my name.