Tom Cruise Gossip

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Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Dear Gossips,

Lions for Lambs comes out on Friday which is why it’s GMD week! And while many prematurely proclaimed his professional death last year, even if Lions does not kill at the box office, it looks like Tom Cruise has officially re-installed himself on the power list, thanks to a fetching young wife and an irresistible Little Sci. Case in point – last night’s dinner at Cipriani in his honour brought out some major stars paying their respects. Everyone is kissing his ass. Sigh. It’s like he’s Voldemort…

As for Britney – how pathetic do you have to be to be ordered to PAY $120,000 for your ex husband to sue you over custody of your kids???

KFed apparently has no income other than the allowance he receives from his Chicken Fried Bankroll. And those monthly alimony payments totalling $15,000 are supposed to dry up in a week. As such, he can’t afford his legal fee. So he’s hitting her up to cover his bills – and she has to do it because she’s so f&cked in the head, she’s deemed less fit to parent their children than he is.

Only Britney could live a life this ass backwards.

Wednesday, blogging all day, check back often.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

MiniVan Tea Party and a Full on Assault

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 7, 2007 00:00:00 November 7, 2007 00:00:00

People Magazine is the Bible for the MiniVan Majority. And today, it is a full-on assault! On the cover of the latest issue of the magazine – Keith Urban, see attached, waxing hilarious about his employer wife, an exclusive deal likely scheduled well in advance withOUT considering Tom Cruise’s timing. Full Story

GMD Permed!!!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 7, 2007 00:00:00 November 7, 2007 00:00:00

All hail the Xenu! After much lobbying over the last few days, and much objection to the GMD’s pin straight hair, perm shots have surfaced showing the GMD with sweet waves! Check it out – first look at Tom in Valkryie, the film besieged with problems during shooting in Germany this past summer. Full Story

Workin’ It

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 7, 2007 06:24:17 November 7, 2007 06:24:17

Damn. Look at KatE Cruise workin’ that carpet. She is spectacular! Clearly lessons with Posh have paid off, only Katie, like all clever pupils, has managed to inject her own warmth and sass into Posh’s plastic pose. Even the Posh Bob looks better on the understudy. Bet your concrete tits Mrs Beckham is not happy about that. Full Story

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GMD at TRL

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 6, 2007 07:09:35 November 6, 2007 07:09:35

He’s wearing more blush than his wife. And for the last time, would someone please tell him that wearing tight pants and standing with his legs far apart WILL NOT make him look taller??? But seriously… I’m so glad he did. It’s like a superhero caricature just before he lifts one arm into the air and blasts off with hot jets steaming out of his ass. Full Story

Not a Moment’s Rest

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 5, 2007 07:11:13 November 5, 2007 07:11:13

Katie Holmes ran a marathon yesterday in the morning and the showed up looking totally gorgeous in the face, but terribly terribly dressed, to the NYC screening of Lions for Lambs just hours later. And yes… Tom is “presenting” her!!! But of course he is. Why pass up the opportunity to evoke Camelot, especially the week before the release of his first movie as head of United Artists? In all fairness, Lions for Lambs doesn’t suck. Full Story

Katie’s “Amazing” Race

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 5, 2007 00:00:00 November 5, 2007 00:00:00

Let’s not take anything away from her accomplishment – bitch ran a f&cking marathon and that’s a hardcore achievement. Check out photos of Katie mid and post-race looking pretty cute all things considered. You run for five and a half hours, see if you come out the other end looking this pretty, especially the shot of her holding Little Sci getting out of the SUV. Full Story

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What a Gay Wants

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 5, 2007 00:00:00 November 5, 2007 00:00:00

There is only one thing wrong with Will Smith. Its name is Tom Cruise. Otherwise, Will Smith is perfect. Check him out, gamely supporting his friend the other night, wrapping his sexy arms around the GMD in a blatant show of solidarity, taunting Tom with his hotness, and the difference between the two is hard to ignore: One is awkward and clenched, the other oozing charm and charisma and killer personal style. Full Story

Dead Eyes, Faux Glow, and a Perm Request

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 5, 2007 00:00:00 November 5, 2007 00:00:00

Katie Holmes last Thursday with her owner at the Lions for Lambs premiere – am all over the dress but she’s totally overmade. Too much blush? Or foundation? Makes her look old, ages a fresh face…and perhaps that’s the point. Otherwise, next to the GMD, she’d look like his much younger sister. Full Story

The Object of Their Affection

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 5, 2007 00:00:00 November 5, 2007 00:00:00

The GMD trotted out all his friends last Thursday for the LA premiere of Lions for Lambs. Among them, David Beckham, and as you can see from the expressions on both Katie’s and Tom’s faces, Becks is definitely ballsdown their favourite. See how Katie absolutely glows looking into his eyes? And see how Tom can’t take his own eyes off Victoria’s husband – coveting him, wanting him, undressing him with his Xenu imagination… Strange the Cruises don’t look like that at each other, non? Haven"t seen Katie this happy, in fact, for over 2 years! source Full Story

It’s Kate!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 31, 2007 00:00:00 October 31, 2007 00:00:00

You hear? It’s KatE Holmes. Not KatIE. And the GMD is making that very clear. He sat down with Entertainment Tonight’s Jann Carl in Paris last week for an interview airing tomorrow to promote his new film Lions for Lambs. Of course in order to do so, Tom started talking about his wife and his Little Sci, all while referring to Katie as KatE:"I feel lucky. Full Story