Posh: my appetite is as real as my tits

December 28, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at December 28, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
And this is why I love Victoria Beckham. Because few bitches are as amusingly absurd at times and genuinely endearing at others. Genuinely endearing examples include Victoria on video - see the Ali G appearance from 2002 and the Beckhams’ World Cup Party this year via YouTube for reference – and Victoria on the rare occasion when she’s smiling…it’s adorable. Amusingly absurd would be her perma-bronze and her perma-pout and her Concrete Tits and her insistence that she hasn’t had anything done to them. New to the Amusingly Absurd list? Her recent assertion on UK radio that she does not have an eating disorder, that she does eat, and that her rail thin physique is the result not of abstaining from food but of observing a strict diet consisting only of fish, fruits, and vegetables. "I eat really healthy, I love Japanese food, lots of fish, any sort of fish, any sort of vegetable, lots of fruit, that kind of thing. I think there"s a big difference between someone having an eating disorder and someone who is controlled about what they eat. There"s a big difference, and every now and then of course I go out and eat what I like. But I do try to be quite disciplined in the way that I eat." Please. Much as I adore her, Mrs Beckham obviously needs a swift boot up her arse. Because CONTROL is exactly what an eating disorder is all about, and without launching into a long ass sermon about anorexia and its symptoms, suffice to say this malnourished idiot has pretty much just admitted to having one – albeit modified for the purposes of Celebrity so that it takes more the form of MANAGED ANOREXIA, in sharp contrast to what we’ve been exposed to in the past, as young girls struggle with deep insecurity and low self esteem, hiding behind baggy clothing and numbing the pain through starvation, this new brigade of vain ass bitches manifest their insecurities by glorifying their food aversions, wearing their meatless bones like a badge of honour, and defending the practice of Managed Anorexia as a form of Discipline rather than Dementia, clearly reflected in Vicky’s comments below about model size: "What is a double zero? I don"t even know what size a double zero is! ? I think models are thin, that"s the way that it is. "All of the girls – I know quite a few models and they actually eat, they"re just naturally thin girls. And just because you"re thin it doesn"t mean you have an eating disorder. What is more of a concern is the age of the girls. Some of the girls on the catwalk are 13 years old and that is more worrying to me than the size of the girl, to be honest." Needless to say, I think we can safely assume she didn’t eat anything at dinner with Gordon Ramsey last night…but hey – at least she looked good right? Rock hard breasts front and centre, waist cinched to within an inch of her life, clutching the arms of the loinquivering perfection known as her husband. Sigh. Leather gloves, leather skinny tie – no one else could rock the rocker waiter and make it look this hot. And still…ironically enough…if you examine the course of their relationship, have you noticed that the hotter HE gets, the skinnier SHE becomes? Classic, non? But let’s end things on a positive note, shall we? There’s only so much Posh bashing I can handle. Turn your attention instead to new photos of her with fellow Spice Geri Halliwell ice skating in London, Geri with the Beckham boys, and Posh hangin’ back to feed Bluebell. Apparently this is as close as it will come to a reunion. Victoria says it ain’t happening. And she also shot down those ridiculous reports she would be starring in a GMD-helmed production about Scientology refreshingly because, in her words, “I can"t bloody act to save my life!” I love Selective Honesty…don’t you? Source and Source and Source and TMZ
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