So you"ve probably heard by now - Star Magazine is reporting that some sorority slut from Texas called Laura Mallory Lane, not a porn star, hooked up with Vince Vaughn in Budapest.
The story leaked when she sent an email to all her girls, describing the encounter in detail. They didn"t have sex, she says, but apparently it was "just as good".
Full contents of the message have not been widely released but an alleged copy of it has just arrived in my inbox.
And while it"s already well known the larger details of their rump, it"s the the unpublicised contents that are the most hilariously smutty...Vince"s signature moves, if you will.
Not a game called "just the tip" but a game called "I Never", during which participants reveal their sexual secrets, like foreplay within the confines of acceptable social behaviour.
Do you love it, or do you LOVE it?
Unedited email below:
My dearest Gammas,
Do I have a story for you. I love you all and hope you dont judge me ;)
So I am in Budapest this past weekend with my two friends Kelly and Lauren, and we are sitting at this vey nice, trendy new restaurant in the city for dinner when in walks Vince Vaughn. He was with two friends and they sat at a table just two away from us. While I was a tad starstruck, we decided to play it cool and act like it wasnt a big deal, not wanting to be annoying and interrupt his dinner. However, I couldnt help but let my eyes wander at one point, and he totally caught me and smiled back and said hello. I smiled and said hi but went immediately back to talking to my friends so I didn"t seem desperate. A little later he gets up to smoke and on his way back stops and starts chatting with us. He talked to us for about 15 minutes, it was really casual, and he just wished us well and went back to his table. After drawing our meal out as long as we could (we were ordering dessert, wine, coffee, the works so we could stay and watch him lol), he finally gets up and leaves so we decided it was time to go. We had no intention of seeing him again, but just thought it was totally cool we even got to talk to him. When we leave the restaurant we decide to check out one of the big bars in Budapest close by. As we are walking in, we see Vince and his friends outside smoking, so of course had to go talk to him. I made some little comment like "so what are you guys following us or something" and the next thing we know they"re inviting us in to have a drink.
After we finish our drinks we decided we should go somewhere else since this bar was really crowded and people kept coming up to him, and we end up bar-hopping and walking around Budapest for the next couple of hours with them. It was unreal. He was super nice and so funny. It was like walking around with his character from Wedding Crashers. And you would think we had known them for years with how casual and relaxed it was. At one point he was even like "Lets play I never," and so there we are playing never have I ever and getting all his dirty secrets out of him. Throughout the night too he and I got in this deep discussion about acting and the theater and film business today, and he gave me like, his whole story of how hes gotten where he is, and I told him where I was in my own acting, and he talked to me about what he thought I should do in terms of my own career.. I GOT ACTING ADVICE FROM VINCE VAUGHN!!
Once it was about 2am all the bars were closing so they suggest going to the hotel bar for another drink. We were thinking omg, but said ok. However, when we got to the hotel, the guy tells us that the bar is closed, and the only way we can get drinks is if we order them from the room. We felt so comfortable with them at this point, (we had been with them for like, 5 hours), and they were not at all sketchy or wierd about it, so we said ok. We went up to the suite and ordered room service and just hung out and listened to music and played would you rather (again, vinces suggestion) and it was so chill. At this point things had started to get a little "couply," and Vince and I had been talking soooo much to each other, and we started to cuddle a little on his couch and get really close. After a little while his friends had to go cuz they had an early flight and my friends decided it was time to leave too. As we were getting up he asks me if i want to stay for another drink, and I said ok. I did not feel pressured at all and felt just totally comfortable, as did my friends. He assured me he would get me back in time for my flight at 11, and next thing I know it was me and Vince Vaughn alone in the hotel room. For a while we just had a drink and talked some more (and yes, we talked about Jen) and one thing led to another and obviously we were messing around before too long. We didnt have sex, but it was just as good :)
Afterwards we just laid in his gigantic beautiful bed with satin sheets, smoking ciggarettes and talking about life. He had a gorgeous view of the river and Buda castle from his window, and we watched the sunrise. I felt like I was in a movie. We didn"t ever go to sleep and in the morning he walked me out and kissed me goodbye in front of everyone and was so sweet.
So yes, I spent the night with Vince Vaughn in Budapest and it was fabulous. I can die happy.
Hope you"re all doing well and I cant wait to see you in just a few more short weeks!!!! :)
Here"s the girl in question and seriously, if this is true...man, I seriously, seriously pity The Pity.
I mean Jennifer ain"t no Jolie but she is way, way, way cuter than that, non?