Dear Gossips,

Happy New Year! Gung Hay Fat Choy! It's the Year of the Monkey. The Monkey is a playful, fun-loving, sometimes mischievous sign. Miley Cyrus was born a monkey. She is such a monkey.

It's understandable to presume that when it's your year it should go your way. Chinese astrology, however, doesn't work like that. Because energy is based in balance. So your best times come when you're flowing in balance – and balance isn’t singular. Which is why an ox in an ox year or a tiger in a tiger year or a monkey in a monkey year doesn’t necessarily mean monkey awesome. Opportunities, however, are always available, if you’re willing to wait.

Monkeys are ambitious but this year, monkeys will not be benefited by any lucky stars so it might be hard to make gains. Be careful this year of backstabbers. There could be arguments and personal drama ahead. Focus then on improving yourself. Study. Exercise. Expand your world. Train. Dedicate this year to personal growth so that when good luck arrives, it’ll find you in your best condition.

1932 Monkeys are in good standing and money is stable but be mindful of your health and watch out for accidents.

1944 Monkeys will have a protector. Go try new things. And keep a chill attitude. Remove yourself from stress whenever possible.

1956 Monkeys are advised to walk away from trouble, avoid confrontation. Take health precautions for yourself and for your family. Celebrate your birthday and pay for your guests.

1968 Monkeys may enjoy the generosity of a scholarly star. You’ll write well and eat well.

1980 Monkeys could be lucky in gambling but don't overdo it because you're not super high on good fortune.

1992 Monkeys will be charming, sweet talkers this year. Have a big birthday. Your luck is held in your forehead this year, a prominent spot on your face and also a big target. So you have to surround yourself with happiness and festivity. 

Overall for Monkeys there is an increased risk of cuts and bruises. See your doctor soon after the New Year for a complete physical, including bloodwork, and your dentist for thorough cleaning. And remember, good luck isn’t a right. It must be earned. So what’s happening this year is that you’ve been given the chance to earn good luck by building on your knowledge, increasing your skills, and becoming more attractive to good luck when it arrives. It’s always better to be ready when it comes than to be unworthy and miss out on the maximum benefits.

Good luck to all of us! May the Year of the Monkey bring you health and happiness. May the Monkey give us peace, security, great gossip – and great Beyonce!

Yours in gossip,


PS. As luck would have it - ha! - I'm having some tech issues today with email and my laptop. Mischievous Monkey indeed. Just a heads up if you see anything wonky.