And when Adrien Brody is in love, it’s like he’s showing you his dick. Check him out at the Rome Film Festival with girlfriend Lara Lieto. Is this a man who’s telling you he’s found the woman of his life, or is this a man telling you how hot sh-t his girlfriend is and that must mean he’s some hot sh-t too?

He’s not the first or only dude to have done this, no, of course not. But it’s the fake castle in upstate New York way he goes about it, you know? Everything is an Axe commercial with Adrien Brody. He’s an Oscar-winning Rico Sauve. He’s the poseur Rastafarian enamoured with his cool a head to toe brown leather suit in the middle of the summer, a talented supposedly cerebral young man on the outside, but on the inside a middle-aged balding billionaire with a paunch proudly flaunting the fact that he bought an escort.