So you know how Hollywood is the pettiest, cattiest cesspool of narcissists and backstabbers? What do you think they’re really saying to themselves now that Alicia Vikander, who’s been in the game a minute, has an Oscar? Jennifer Lawrence did it too. But Jennifer Lawrence has kind of been an unstoppable force. I don’t see Alicia quite the same way. CLUE!

As we all know, Alicia in the Best Supporting Actress category was considered by many to be category fraud. Her performance in The Danish Girl was exquisite. It was indeed a career-making role. But it’s one of those would-have-been situations. What would have been if Michael Jordan played in the era of Dr J? What would have been if Sidney Crosby played in the era of Wayne Gretzky? Those are impossible scenarios. Alicia in The Danish Girl vs Brie Larson in Room, however, was not impossible. That woulda been a title fight, non?

Here’s Alicia looking super, super cute at Louis Vuitton. I’m telling you, the shoes this season! Just in time for the end of my shoe ban!