Is that what you call it? Blush? So much of it. Too much of it. And strapless. And all of a similar shape.

Let’s start with Amy Adams who...I mean Duana and I hated it the minute we saw it. Look at the bottom. It’s sh-tting tulle. The dress is SH-ITTING tulle. Here it comes, you ready? It’s sh-tting tulle because...

Marchesa. Obviously.

In comparison then, Megan Fox’s Dolce & Gabbana was much less offensive. And those earrings are exquisite. You know what? I bet you she’s not even wearing spanx. At this point I know I’m supposed to say something about her face. What can I say about her face that I haven’t said before, already? I said it last month, here. So the only thing I really have to add is that the first Transformers came on TV a couple of weeks ago and you would not believe how crazy the difference is. She was so nice and natural(ish) to look at then compared to whatever it is that’s happened now.