Ashlee Simpson Gossip

You know,  sometimes – often – I rail about how people should try to give their children names of equal heft and style, so that they don’t feel they’re unequal from the start. You know, balance that sibling rivalry. I always think about the siblings I met at the park called George and Eden. Full Story

Jessica and Ashlee Simpson were in North Carolina this weekend promoting Porny’s clothing line. Apparently some of that is maternity now? At some point during the event, Porny propped her kid up on the table for photographs. We can all agree this is a business engagement, right? So... I mean. Full Story

This is Ashlee Simpson’s video for her song Bat For A Heart which looks to me like a millennial version of Madonna’s Lucky Star. She says “f-ck” and it’s supposed to be hardcore. How many different things has Ashlee Simpson tried to be? And is it unfair that we are critical of her, um, evolution because of her last name? At the beginning, when she fronted like a poseur Avril Lavigne -- in and of itself hilarious, someone posing like a poseur, and totally unironically -- Joe Simpson was all over it, and had probably created it. Full Story

It’s official, even though you’ve known about for almost a month now -- Jessica Simpson confirmed her pregnancy by posting a photo of her daughter Maxwell in “BIG SIS” pose and announcing it via a new commercial for Weight Watchers (posted below). Then, conveniently, the paps converged in Hawaii where Porny’s on holiday with her family. Full Story

I don’t think I’ve received a single email disagreeing about my position on Porny’s pregnancy style: that it’s remarkably superior to her non-pregnancy style, as in it’s GOOD style. Crazy talk, right? But look at her, stringing together win after win this week in New York in her maternity clothes. Finally finding the proportion in her choices in length and fit and tightness and/or looseness. Full Story

There was a story last week about how Porny’s dad is still negotiating with a magazine for a half million dollar deal to officially confirm her pregnancy which is why she hasn’t said anything about it yet. Two challenges here:Jessica is apparently quite far along. Jessica is too dumb to hide it. How else can you explain why she’s tottering around JFK in a tight black shirt barely concealing her own baby AND Beyonce’s goose feather pillow? BumpWatch is the worst with reliability, yes, but then there’s just the obvious. Full Story

I could have sworn that just a month ago Ashlee Simpson and estranged husband Pete Wentz were still behaving... un-estrangedly. Well I guess that passed. Ashlee was photographed walking hand in hand with her new boyfriend in NYC the other day. They were well aware they were being papped. She made no attempt to hide. Full Story

I suppose when it comes to marriage these days, you can never really say. I’m the only person I know whose parents divorced and then got back together – like 10 years later. When I tell this to other people with divorced parents, it’s hard to fathom. Because by then, you can’t imagine your parents any other way but apart anymore. Full Story

She’s 26. They’ve been married almost 3 years. Her sister Jessica was also married about the same amount of time to Nick Lachey. She split from him at 25. Young marriages, you know? Ashlee and Pete Wentz however have a child. They were photographed just a month ago, seemingly fine, with Bronx in LA. Full Story

Picture a waitress at a restaurant. And you ask for the check. And she reaches into her change apron and pulls it out. And you hand her your bills, and she digs around in there again and gives you some coins, and a fiver. Isn’t this was what my Porny was wearing around her waist last night at the LG event hosted by Victoria Beckham and Eva Longoria? Yes. Full Story

You know I have a soft spot for Jessica Simpson. She makes mistakes, she says stupid sh-t, she will always choose cheap over classy, but it also seems wrong to hate on someone so dumb. There are good intentions underneath those breasts. It just takes a lot of patience to get through the dead air to find them. Full Story