This could be a daily feature.

Today’s installment includes Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore, and Scarlett Johansson.

Let’s start with the sanctimonious husband and wife.

Ashton has taken to Twitter and posted a video on his page that is supposed to illustrate how difficult it is to “navigate” through the sea of paps waiting to harass them at the airport yesterday en route to Germany. You’ll hear Demi’s voice on the video accusing the paps of calling her a “crazy little bitch”.

In reality however there were, like, maybe 3 photographers present. And, better still, an alternative video capturing a different version of events…

Click here to see both videos.

In the other video, the pap is overheard asking Ashton about:

1. The Super Bowl – pretty standard
2. His noisy neighbour situation relating to a video that Ashton put up himself on the internet – fair game

How.F-cking.Oppressive.

Right?

And you will note, she was not called a “crazy little bitch”. She was actually called a “crazy little thing”.

The hypocrisy of it all?

Ashton is protesting the alleged pervasive presence of the paps. But did you know… he recently launched a gossip blog? For girls? Called Blahgirls.com?

Right now, on the Blah Girls main page, there are pap shots of Isla Fisher and her baby and Chace Crawford in New York today.

Isn’t this an implied endorsement of the paparazzi? Of course not. Somehow he’ll be able to explain it away. It’s called Celebrity Truth. Their truth is not your truth. Or anyone’s truth. They can justify ANYTHING.

And Scarlett Johansson doesn’t diet or exercise.

Scarlett gave an interview to In Touch – A TABLOID MAGAZINE that supports pap photos and is WRONG most of the time – to promote That Movie. She claims that she has a healthy self image and has not restricted food, or worked herself silly inside a gym to maintain her famous physique. Selective wording? Probably.

The point is, what she’s trying to say, is that even though she’s one of the hottest young actresses in the business, she doesn’t subscribe to Hollywood standards.

Bull.F-cking.Sh-t.

Read more of Scarlett’s interview, click here.