As I said, I would not be surprised if she was sitting on his face as soon as they got off stage.

Oh I’m sorry, was that too crude for you?

Who are we talking about here? Are we talking about Prince William? Or are we talking about Ashton Kutcher who spent his 6 year wedding anniversary in a hot tub with a rally girl, NASCAR at best? And, right beside him, Elle Macpherson who...

Is not shy, to put it more politely, for those of who still haven’t recovered from the initial visual. They’re certainly tall enough for each other. And what happens next? Well, see, there’s a reason Elle Macpherson has been single for such a long time. So there may be no better karmic consequence for Ashton Kutcher than a new brand of crazy that he can’t get out of his bed.