Dumb people support dumb movies

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 6, 2011 15:54:00 December 6, 2011 15:54:00

Ashton Kutcher attended his first movie premiere since being publicly exposed as an unfaithful moron of a husband, now single. HereΓÇÖs Ashton last night on the carpet with Lea Michele for New YearΓÇÖs Eve. He and Lea are paired together in the movie. So it was her duty to pose with him like theyΓÇÖre friends, like they enjoy each otherΓÇÖs company. I know Lea is annoying and that we love to hate her. But my choice here is to assume that this is a professional obligation for her, a subtle order by the studio, if you will, to be nice to him so that we can begin the process of healing his reputation, and then his career.

It wonΓÇÖt take long.

Just look at all those goddamn fans. Those idiots lined up screaming at him for his autograph. If you passed by a crowd of people clamouring for Ashton KutcherΓÇÖs autograph, would you keep walking, or would you stop and join in, like itΓÇÖs free food and you canΓÇÖt leave without getting some?

MORE people would stop for Ashton. Why? Because...

HeΓÇÖs famous.

ThatΓÇÖs, like, the only reason you need these days.

HeΓÇÖs famous.

HeΓÇÖs a f-cking dickhead but... heΓÇÖs famous.

I want to be able to say I got Ashton KutcherΓÇÖs autograph. I want to be able to put his picture up on my Facebook...why? So all your friends will know you were waiting around for that loser at his movie premiere?

You canΓÇÖt blame movie studios, television executives, fashion magazines, clothing designers, agents, Anna Wintour, and the government for this sh-t.  ItΓÇÖs Us. ItΓÇÖs We. WeΓÇÖre Them. WeΓÇÖre DUMB.


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