Charlie Sheen is…well…he’s Charlie Sheen. And Charlie Sheen can’t leave Ashton Kutcher alone on Twitter about Two And A Half Men. So Ashton was on Jimmy Kimmel last night and had a message:

"Dude, shut the f--k up! Seriously, like, enough already. It's three years later and you're still blowing me up on Twitter? Come on, dude, really?"

Interesting shit vs diarrhoea dilemma here. Who’s the sh-t and who’s the diarrhoea? And some of you might be like, come on Lainey, Ashton Kutcher’s a douchebag but Charlie Sheen is despicable and dirty and …well…he’s Charlie Sheen. Yes. He is Charlie Sheen. He’s GROSS. He’s a gross human being. But here’s what I appreciate about Charlie Sheen: he doesn’t pretend to be anything other than a gross human being. He is exactly who he claims he is: a gross human being.

Whereas Ashton Kutcher…

Ashton Kutcher claims to live Up Here but really exists Down There. At least closer to Down There than he sells it, right? Tell me then. Who’s your sh-t and who’s your diarrhoea?