If Azealia Banks didn’t have social media as an outlet for her obnoxious rants, would she even exist? It’s the internet troll version of “if a tree falls in a forest…” The reason we are even acknowledging Banks’ existence today is because she crawled out from under the moldy, dilapidated bridge she lives under to disrespect Rihanna, pop’s reigning Queen of badassery, and spew her usual nonsensical Trump-loving bullsh-t.

To recap, Azealia Banks is a rapper with one semi-recognizable single who has “feuded” with Pharrell, T.I, ASAP Rocky, Iggy Azalea, Kendrick Lamar, Zayn Malik, Russell Crowe and chickens. Most of these so-called beefs have just consisted of Banks tweeting nonsense at the aforementioned real celebrities while desperately trying to stay relevant. Some of them were more complicated (see: Russell Crowe). As for the chickens, click here at your own risk. She has since been banned from Twitter for her racist, homophobic and disgusting rants so this time, she took her unique talents to Instagram.

On Saturday, Rihanna tweeted her completely valid and, in my opinion, correct views about the Muslim ban.

In response, even though no one asked her, Banks posted this on Instagram:

“As far as Rihanna (who isn’t a citizen, and can’t vote) and all the rest of the celebrities who are using their influence to stir the public, you lot really REALLY need to shut up and sit down… Stop chastising the president. It’s stupid and pathetic to watch. All of these confused people confuse other confused people. Hoping the president fails is like getting on an airplane and hoping the pilot crashes.”

But what if the pilot is already steering the plane straight into the ground, Azealia? I’m not going to squander my intelligence by breaking down everything wrong with what Banks says here although I do want to make it clear that I unequivocally disagree with every f-cking word. Azealea Banks is a black woman in America so her allegiance to, as Rihanna so eloquently put it, an “immoral pig” is confounding. It’s also really confusing why Rihanna decided to engage with a professional troll at all but I’m not mad at it for a couple of reasons. First, RiRi seemed like she was having fun when she posted this:


the face you make when you a immigrant πŸ‡§πŸ‡§ #stayawayfromthechickens #iheartnuggets #saveourhens.

A photo posted by badgalriri (@badgalriri) on

Second, owning the pride she has for being an immigrant was the perfect play here.
There was more back and forth through now-deleted Instagram comments which culminated in Banks posting Rihanna’s phone number. WHY does Azaelia Banks have Rihanna’s phone number? The number leak is now the go-to celebrity feud tactic. Everyone should protect their numbers from Azealia Banks at all costs.
So, Rihanna retaliates by making her Twitter avatar a screenshot of a text Azealia Banks sent her. This is also now deleted but you can see the screenshot below.

Again, HOW did Azealia Banks get Rihanna’s number? And girlfriend needs to keep Beyonce’s name out of her mouth. Beyhive, get in formation. We all know girl sh-t is the best sh-t but is it still fun when the girl sh-t is between a legit superstar and a wannabe D-list celebrity?

Remember when Meek Mill tried to come for Drake? Azealia Banks is not even the Meek Mill in this scenario. Azealia Banks is D-Line, the dude from Meek Mill’s entourage no one remembers. The only comforting thing in all of this is the hope that Azealia Banks’ relevance will have a shorter shelf-life than the macaws on Nicole Kidman’s Gucci dress. Rihanna shouldn’t have wasted her precious time.