So Benji Madden and Ebola are now supposedly an item. This less than two weeks after he broke off his engagement with Sophie Monk. The much better looking Sophie Monk. And for those who say looks aren’t everything – are you going to tell me that diseased virus Paris Hilton has a better personality than Sophie Monk? Really???

But clearly… clearly this makes more sense.

Wonky eyed, big footed Ebola and the, um, not so pretty Madden as a couple make sense and the much more pulchritudinous pairing of Sophie Monk with Ebola’s former five minute fling Alex Vaggo make even more sense. They were seen together last night leaving a club looking like they just walked out of a fragrance ad.

Alex, though infected, is gorgeous. His private parts are probably oozing puss, but the face is undeniably attractive. And Sophie. Well, Sophie is gorgeous.

It probably kills Paris to know it too. To see so much gorgessity in one frame – and a great improvement on her too, although my sources tell me out of the Good Charlotte tour is that she’s trying to get pregnant.

Xenu help us all.

Photos from