Here’s Beyonce in New Orleans where she’s been working on her half time show for the Super Bowl this Sunday. This is my current first world problem: we’re having Chinese New Year family dinner that night in Toronto where, again, I don’t have PVR. And now I’m worried my slingbox won’t work. I can’t miss Beysus maybe lip-synching but definitely performing with wind machines!

How many wind machines?

These are the details I wish could be made public. Like, enough with all the “rider” information -- that the dressing room has to be a certain colour and stocked with champagne etc etc etc -- that’s so 1999. And at this point, they’re all the same anyway.

Give me the wind machine count. This is what matters. I need the wind machine count for a Beyonce stage. Is it above or below 20? What are the angles? Is there a tester? Is there a Beyonce body double who wears a copy of her wig who stands in front of the wind machines to rehearse the hair blow?

Check out how the wind machine works for B’s fragrance Pulse NYC shoot in the video below. I love how she’s all about making it “sophisticated” but her dress is being held together by pantyhose, as styled by Joe Zee which, poor Joe Zee. Great professional opportunity, yes, but I’m wondering if this was the aesthetic he had in mind. Does B have a cold?

Am also attaching some shots from B’s awesome Tumblr. She’s updated it recently, have you been to visit? The “My Life” and “My Work” photos have been separated. And you might lose yourself in the “Show Me” section where she’s uploaded videos and home movies, a glamour shot orgy, from that high security protected archive, obviously, that’s to be the foundation of her future presidential library.