Like I said in the open, every time I’m offline for a day or two, or hop on a plane for a long haul flight, I live in fear of missing a big story, the biggest story being that the Brange will implode. It’s the Hollywood equivalent of a stock market crash, or a government collapse. It would usher in a new celebrity world order in the aftermath of great upheaval.

For now though, the Brange is all good. And in the spirit of the giving season, they’ve benevolently gifted to us a drama-free holiday break. With photographs. Of course.

Last week they were “caught” at a supermarket in Namibia shopping for last minute Christmas gifts. Now they’ve released a group photo with their Namibian hosts Dr Rudie van Vuuren and family with whom they’ve been staying while spending time in the birthplace of the Chosen One.

For Brangelunatics and tabloid editors alike, this is the best present ever: the sight of the Chosen One Shiloh, of pure blood and white skin, spreading Brange peace and love across the universe.

I’m more interested in knowing who Miss Zahara is giving the side-eye to. And did they make it out alive?

Look how beautiful the Jolie is when she doesn’t try. And when she tries, as she did throughout The Tourist promotional circuit, it’s all ass from head to toe.


Photo from Fame