Fresh off her Caribbean getaway, Britney Spears made an appearance this weekend at her cousin’s wedding in Amite, Louisiana. Jamie Lynn was listed as a bridesmaid, Chicken Fried was listed as an “honourary” bridesmaid.

By all accounts, Britney looked amazing. In a brown dress to the ankle, v in the front and back, hair was straight, didn’t look budget, good makeup, and very white teeth. Always the teeth. Even when she’s crazy f-cking strapped to a stretcher, those teeth can still dazzle.

While Jamie Lynn mingled with guests, happily showed off her baby with her recovered baby daddy, and acted like a normal person, Britney spent the entire time sitting at a table in the back, with her assistant and a bodyguard and a man they all called “the douchey boyfriend”, believed to be her agent Jason Trawick who was seen in the Bahamas with her last week. Trawick walked around like he’s better than everyone else, giving the impression that he was wasting his time at a Southern wedding with people who don’t matter.

The most common observation about Britney:

That she’s not properly socialised. And the difference between Britney and Jamie Lynn slaps you in the face. Jamie Lynn is comfortable around people. She is capable of conversing with others, of being part of a community, of functioning in society.

Britney Spears can’t.

Ironic, non? That pregnancy at 16 removed JL from the danger of becoming the same. She took herself out of that life, away from Hollywood, after seeing the example of her sister pushed into child star slave labour and getting f-cked up in the process.

Meanwhile, the relentless push of Team Britney continues.

They have more plans, endless plans, in the works. Two weeks ago, Britney reshot her Candie’s ads with Matthew Rolston and word is, her Machine is considering a photo book in time for the holidays to go along with a couple of Christmas songs. Money, money, money…

Determined to make up the money that’s been squandered over the last few years. That’s apparently the excuse. They want to get the bank account back up to what it was. And they’ve promised her she can quit when they fill up the tank again.