Brody Jenner and Chace Crawford at the MMVAs last night.

Don’t quiver for either. But straight up, boy to boy, it’s Brody all the way.

Seriously… there are those of you who don’t get it. I’m on your side. The frenzy over reality stars is alarming. Having said that, Brody Jenner is the captain of the football team. Of any generation. He is handsome. He is lean but not skinny, well built but not beefcake, and he has good hair. He does not have Jude Law hair. It will not recede when he’s 30. And as an added bonus, Brody is also tall. Like tall without lying about it. Not like “Hollywood” tall where they add 2 inches minimum. Brody is legitimately tall.

He also walks with the air of a boy who has spent his whole life sauntering just ahead of all the other boys. You see it at the mall all the time. In the hallways at school. Not the way a bully charges up to the front but the way the leader takes the lead because everyone else has conceded it. And he accepts it graciously.

Brody has an easy smile, an easy gait, he looks great in pants, and I have to tell you, when he steps up to the bar and orders a drink…yeah, he’s a babe. If that’s your thing, he’s a total babe. But watching Brody isn’t what’s interesting. It’s watching the people around him. The girls around him.

Of course they were swooning. He came into the eTalk Lounge where it was party central and the thing about a guy like Brody is that he’s so becoming every woman thinks she has a chance. She’s like – oh just let me make eye contact. If he sees me, he’ll want me.

How is it that sometimes hope can override reason? What is it in the female DNA that causes us to temporarily abandon common sense when presented with a set of great teeth and hot abs? It wasn’t happening for any of them. But it was like they had all just heard Barack Obama deliver a rousing speech.

Yes we can, they heaved with their bosoms.

No you cannot, you dumb bitches.

This is Brody with Ben Mulroney after their interview. I saw him later upstairs in the private party area. He ordered a drink right away and held court with Kristin Cavallari who was approached for an interview and answered through her publicist that she was done for the night.

What? Who the f&ck are you??? Sit DOWN Kristin Cavallari!

Back to Brody… some girl spotted him from across the room and tried to make her move. She decided to hit the loo first. Bad choice. By the time she came out, he’d stepped away. The look on her face – complete defeat. Like the moment Jennifer Aniston found out about Angelina Jolie.

And then there’s Chace Crawford. Chace Crawford walks around like a sulky baby. When he’s not on the carpet, when the cameras aren’t rolling, he wears a pinched face like he’s so much better than what he’s doing. Like he thinks he should be living George Clooney’s life and the universe conspired against him to change his destiny. Please.

We passed each other just outside the second floor balcony. He was being led through a packed party area to do an interview, shirking away from everyone walking close to him with darty eyes seeking one of those “status” bodyguards favoured by the likes of Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera.

To his credit, he was obliging with younger fans. Daughters of executives and clients invited inside who approached for a photographs were treated to a few pictures together as his publicist hovered like a hawk. As he stepped into the eTalk area, I saw him stick his finger into his mouth and rub his front teeth before heading in to talk to Tanya Kim.

Now no one wants to be on camera with food in their teeth, but seeing that, and his pretty pretty face, and his perfectly straightened hair, and his grey leather jacket that fit just so, all 5 ft 9 of him (on a good day), there was only word that came to mind to sum it all up:


PS. Rumour has it he was looking for somethin’ extra after the show. Am told he found it. Chace partied at Ultra with Brody and Whitney Port later on. eTalk has exclusive photos tonight.