Will & Kate’s wedding was watched by a billion around the world. Or was it billions? It was a big f-cking deal. The end.

Now there’s another royal wedding happening this weekend and, well, so far it’s been pretty low on public fascination, especially outside of certain ports in Europe. To be honest, I actually wasn’t going to write about it at all. Until the bride supposedly tried to make a break for it.

Her name is Charlene Wittstock. She’s from South Africa. She is to marry Prince Albert of Monaco who is 53, the son of Grace Kelly, and now the ruler of the Principality. He’s the head of his Royal Family which has ruled for something like 800 years. And he’s a well known playboy who has fathered several children out of wedlock, now apparently ready to finally take a wife...?

Rumour has it it all caught up to Charlene and she realised it wasn’t the life she wanted. Rumour has it she took off the other day and tried to escape but they stopped her at the airport and coaxed her back to the palace. They are denying everything, of course, insisting that Charlene is great, fine, ready to take her vows. And they’re threatening lawsuits against members of the French press for circulating the story.

Suddenly this wedding just got a LOT more interesting.

Maybe to make it more interesting, they came up with this. Maybe they wanted to somehow at least generate a fraction of the heat that Will & Kate attracted. Maybe.

Can you imagine? Can you imagine her pulling a Runaway Bride literally when she’s halfway down the aisle? And, since she’s a former swimmer, jumping into the Mediterranean and onto an awaiting yacht, into the arms of Jason Patrick?

(Many of you won’t get that reference and it makes me sad. Because back in the day, Julia Roberts produced the best gossip ever. )

Click here to read more about Charlene’s alleged breakaway.

Anyway, here are Charlene and Prince Albert last week at various events in Monte Carlo with other members of the royal family including Princess Caroline and the beautiful Charlotte Casiraghi who could totally be Gossip Wish List material for Prince Harry.

Also attached – more from Will and Kate at Wimbledon yesterday doing the wave. They’re adorable. Imagine the Queen doing the wave? Please. And I LOVE the scalloped straps on that Temperley dress.

Photos from Wenn.com and Clive Mason/Gettyimages.com