Jessica Biel did it in Prada at the Oscars in 2009. Like a handkerchief at the chest. Click here for refresher.

This is, of course, Charlize Theron. Who always favours a bow. And hers is at the hip. So, obviously, it’s not quite as dumbass as Biel’s attempt at impressing Anna Wintour.

But...

As much as it’s Dior and she’s a princess and Charlize never stumbles, here’s what I see when I’m looking at that hip bow:

Colonoscopy Bag.

Maybe I’ve been spending too much time in the hospital with my ma. But that’s my association. Can’t get down with a dress that reminds me of something that collects elimination.