On a boozy night with my eTalk producers last week, we all decided that we are OBSESSED with Rumer Willis. And we are determined to make her a star. Because she wants so badly to be one... which means she needs an eating disorder and a very inappropriate relationship followed by a trip to rehab. All very controllable developments under the careful guidance of a great publicist.

But for one obstacle.

Since I’m already going to hell, I’ll say out loud what you’re thinking in your head – Rumer can get stick thin and drug addicted and Rumer might be blessed with 2 famous parents and a pretty hunky stepdad, but Rumer ain’t blessed in other ways, savvy? And worse still, Rumer ain’t just average either…

I KNOW. It’s SOOOO mean. And it’s SOOO unfair. To be born to Demi Moore and then…and then. Now ordinarily of course, to talk of such things is most definitely crossing the line. But here’s the thing – Rumer is craving fame. Rumer wants to be Lilo. Rumer wants that life. So if she’s going to aim there, she’s gonna have to be prepared to be aimed AT.

There is however some good news. The good news is that Rumer may have found her angle. You know we all have an angle? I have a few friends who model occasionally – they say all great models work hard to find their angles, that it’s a crime to not know your good angle.

So check out Rumer Willis in the new Us Weekly – poor thing…they’re calling her the Sidekick to the Stars. Ouch.

Anyway, as you can see in the large photo, she’s tilting her face away just so and actually looks…

Not bad.

Everyone has an angle see?

By the way, she’s pictured with the new Brat on the Block, Hayden Panettiere, also the next Lohan in training, who is trying and failing miserably to get our attention. Bet your boob job she’ll lose 30 pounds by Christmas? These things are like clockwork…