Gael Garcia Bernal is a jury member this year. His bestie Diego Luna is presenting a film. So of course they’re inseparable. And of course it’s adorable to see them truly enjoying being around each other. The crowd went wild when they arrived together on Friday night with the two young stars of Diego’s movie perhaps the next version of themselves.

If you’ve seen Y Tu Mama Tambien and Rudy y Cursi and followed them through the years, I’m sure you know. You are either a GGB or a Diego. Me I’m a Diego. All the way Diego.

As for Salma...

I wish I could have flipcammed her sh-t for you and we could watch it back together over and over. It’s like Julia Roberts and WHO’s NATALIE???????

Friday night in Cannes, Salma was epic. Cannes is a busy carpet because there are usually several films screening at the same time and they share arrivals. Which means they hustle them along, yes, even the famous people. Because it’s not a long stretch either. With only so much room, they can’t stand there for half an hour and work every pose in their books.

This is a problem when Salma wants to greet her friends. For Salma, the carpet is her living room. She can stay there for as long as she wants. Arriving with Francois-Henri Pinault, always slightly behind her, Salma made a huge motherf-cking production of greeting GGB and Diego like mamma’s come home to her boys. Then it was time for photos. And then she was holding sh-t up. So they tried to hurry her along. Oh no. You don’t hurry Salma. Not unless you want the Salma bitchface. And she gave it to them. Along with some choice words. And she waved her hand at her man to make him lay down a few choice words too. Discreetly of course. Salma has an amazing ability to cause a contained scene. It’s actually a very remarkable skill.

Unfortunately not even she can take down an entire carpet. So she made her way up the stairs. But she was still pissed by the time she came into the theatre, shaking her head, stalking ahead of Francois, flapping her hands at a handler. I wanted to throw myself in her way just to have her step all over my back. It would have made her feel better. That bitch is everything you want her to be.

Photos from and FRANCOIS GUILLOT/Sean Gallup/Pascal Le Segretain/ANNE-CHRISTINE/