I really, really need your help. In February I will be giving birth to our second child (gender is unknown) and cannot think of the perfect boy name. Our first child is a boy named Tate, and I have yet to run into another one his age (or any age for that matter). We loved his name and knew it was our only option if we had a boy. This time around we have a perfect girl name, but there is no way I am going into the hospital unprepared without a name for both genders. Our last name is Italian and ends in an O so that limits us a bit (ex. I love the name Matteo but it won't work with our surname). Requirements are: nothing common (I want a name that I won't hear on the playground or in school) and easy to spell (I am not a fan of adding in letters to make a name "different." Ew.) It is starting to drive me nuts and I am so afraid that we will not have a name come February. HELP!

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The title is a reference to a book I read about feuding siblings (last name Tate) who band together to fix a situation they’re in and wind up proud of themselves. Am I supposed to have this much recall of books I read when I was 8?  

Anyway, it was a great name then and it’s a great name now. But it is maybe somewhat singular. In fact, when I was thinking about your criteria – not heard in the schoolyard and going with Tate – I thought of Donovan. I know, it’s wrong for you for a million reasons, but if someone else is reading and likes this trail of names, there you go. Little gift.

Still, I feel pressure to find something not only timeless and unusual but a bit sleek.  A very early experience with a name like this was a classmate named Morgan – yes, a boy. I know there are some girls with this name and it wouldn’t be the first Welsh name to be adopted, but I still think there’s viability for a boy, particularly if his brother’s name is Tate – I wouldn’t feel the same way if his older brother was Greg or Charlie, rest assured.

How about Casper? Yeah, yeah, ghosts – nobody remembers that. Come on, all of us of childbearing age barely watched that, you know I’m right. If that’s a bridge too far, how about Calvin? You don’t hear of many and it’s got winning sounds all over it.    Keeping on the K-sounds, how about Keir? It’s not for everyone but it’s SO stylish and sleek, and if your last name starts with O (I’ve been imagining it’s Toronado), come on. Keir Toronado? Lovely.

Dermot comes up a lot, but if you don’t want two boys ending in ‘t’, how about Leif?  Piers? Even Knox, which should sound pretentious but somehow gets away with just being awesome? Adler might stray a little too far into surnames-on-purpose for me, but what about Omar? Omar Toronado? The O at beginning and end might actually work. No? 

Then I will go to names that begin and end the same way, as Tate does. It’s a nice way to go without matching. Tate and Silas. Tate and Seamus. Tate and Nolan. Tate and Lyle. Tate and Ryder, if that floats you, even though I bet it didn’t.

What will happen with the Tate Détente? Let me know!