If I’m on the board of Real Madrid, I am sh-tting f-cking panic this morning. Because the team just purchased Cristiano Ronaldo for $130 million from Manchester United and how does he celebrate?

He celebrates with an Ebola infection.

Which means he’s effectively pissed away his money. Don’t be surprised if he gets injured. Don’t be shocked if he sucks. If he can’t find the net. Because Ebola Hilton’s black hole vagina virus spares no one.

So yesterday it broke up with that loser Doug Reinhardt. Last night it hit up MyHouse with its sister Nicky. As soon as it saw Ronaldo it knew its disease had found a new host.

Within moments Ronaldo was making out with it, his tongue in its mouth, inviting its polluted cells into his prized body, destroying his potential, killing the dreams of Real Madrid fans everywhere.

He ended up following it to Nicky’s place and didn’t leave until 5pm.

And now it’s making headlines all over Europe. Exactly what it wanted. This is what Doug could not deliver. So it will bleed Ronaldo dry, it will suck every morsel of media traction of out him, and then it will look for a new victim.

Source The Sun

Photos from INFdaily.com and Wenn.com and Octavio R Vera Jr/Splashnewsonline.com